S3 EP2: Dating Dilemmas and Celebrity Conspiracy Theories

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Welcome to Jerking Around, a podcast that makes you feel better about yourself, because we're a mess just like you, and Crystal makes fun of me the whole time and it's great and it's real.

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Hey guys, welcome back to Jerking Around.

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Today we talk about Dating and paying for the guy, paying for the girl.

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Do you think he should pay?

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Do you think you should 50-50?

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How should it work in dating and?

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marriage.

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And holes.

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Oh, and it's just a hole.

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Make it nice Dime in that hole.

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Make it hard to get in.

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Yeah, don't let everyone in your hole.

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Yeah, like you.

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Yeah, and of course, p Diddy, johnson and Johnson, our favorite sponsors, yeah, so listen along.

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We're recording with, we're going to talk about you, jet.

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Jet is here, he's behind the camera.

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Yeah, and Tisha, I'm not going to say what you.

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Crystal no, always tries to say I'm a pedophile.

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She is, and that I like little boys.

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She does and it's so wrong and gross?

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She really does, and weird.

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No, there's someone Remember in the podcast weeks ago.

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A 20 something year old is not a little boy.

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Yeah, because the time you were 20 something he was a little boy.

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I know but we're talking now.

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No, you're not calling Kristen Cavallari a pedophile.

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Yeah, I thought it was weird and I knew it wasn't going to last.

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And now look at him.

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Yeah, but he is really.

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But if he needs, somebody to help take the pain away.

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I'm available.

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It's like if you were to define what a jawline should look like, it's his.

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Yeah, All right, let's talk about all the things happening.

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Tisha is.

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Her goal is to get censored on this thing.

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No, so her idol today was Kristen Cavallari about and we're not trying to offend anyone.

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I don't really think it's offensive.

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It's just it's borderline facts at this point.

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But yeah, Um, do you?

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Why don't you tell what you sent me this morning?

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Okay, so Kristen Cavallari, who people know is from the Hills reality star, she has a podcast.

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She has a podcast called let's be honest.

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Do you think she's?

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that honest on it.

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I feel today she was.

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I think actually she is pretty honest.

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I actually think she is yeah.

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It's kind of like a boring title, but it's fine.

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Really I kind of oh.

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I thought, it was cute, really.

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Yeah, like I want to be honest, what is she talking?

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about.

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Oh, I was like well, duh, who's lying on the podcast?

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Let's be liars, Like it's stupid.

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I do want to lie, like.

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we said some things on last week's podcast that we want to be liars.

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Yeah, and I'm.

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We're trying to.

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Let's be honest and keep it not from editing it out, cause that's our whole goal is to be honest, but it's so hard to be honest.

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Maybe that's why she made it that Cause like yeah, cause now she can't be a liar Right, they'll call her out.

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Yeah, so it's kind of a boring name, but it's fine.

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But today she was talking about the Kanye.

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She thinks Kanye is cloned because Explain what you're talking about.

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Now we're going into Tisha's conspiracies a little bit.

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I mean I don't know if people are cloned or not, but I'm not saying they are and I mean there are.

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I do kind of think Britney is cloned at this point.

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It's very weird.

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There's something really wrong.

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Yeah.

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So anyways, she thinks Kanye is a clone because he one time said like if I go away for a long time and come back and I'm different, it's not me.

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He is different though.

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Yeah, Like it's a different body.

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He acts different, he talks different.

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It's very different.

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So she was saying that it it was, that he was a clone.

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so we were just like laughing and she talks to illuminati, and that's a word you don't say so if we get canceled from here on.

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You heard it from us and the cabal.

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Yeah, what's the?

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cabal, it's like the the red.

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It's like no no it's like the group of people in control of the world you know, jay-z yeah, yeah, like he's part of it so in the illuminati there's cabal I think they're the same oh there's two names, I'm not sure exactly.

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Yeah, if they asked you to be in, would you do it?

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No, because I think you have to sell your soul.

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I'm being dead serious.

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No, I know I believe you yeah, and I don't want to sell it.

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It's not for sale, I'm guarding it.

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No, there's songs about it.

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No it's scary.

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Well, and then, yeah, and I also saw this really weird video of this guy.

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He was like an actor and he was saying, like to get into a role he would like let these demons possess his body.

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It was very weird, yeah, okay, yeah, cut that.

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It's getting.

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I'm scared.

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Anyways, back up.

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Back up, anyways.

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Anyways, kristen got censored after she said that, which is so weird because TikTok censored it and then Spotify censored her podcast.

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Yeah, it's crazy.

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And she was saying how she's probably going to get killed.

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Oh gosh.

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She didn't say that, yeah, she said.

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She said other people get killed.

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She said if she talks like this, she's probably going to get killed, canceled.

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She said yeah, that means killed.

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She told Justin, you'll get killed.

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Oh gosh.

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Because he said if you got cloned, get killed.

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Yeah, so do you think that that happens, that they kill people totally?

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Oh my god, the clintons kill everybody.

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Oh my gosh.

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Well, that was a fun podcast.

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Oh boy, we weren't gonna go there, but I guess we did.

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Speaking of hollywood and all the goodness he did, he let's talk about it some more.

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I sent tisha this oh my gosh, this real.

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I have to pull it up because it was so bad.

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It talks about how P Diddy said his sponsor was Johnson Johnson, which is so mind-boggling after how much baby oil they found.

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Yeah, he literally said I thank you, my sponsors, on stage somewhere, johnson Johnson, for all your sponsorship.

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And then he talked about his idols and it was like um it was like Johnson and Johnson is so funny, Like always ask me how I do it.

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It really comes down to one thing Never take no for an answer that's scary.

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Like Jay Z uh, michael Jackson and R Kelly always told me.

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No, it's just yes, in disguise, and I truly believe that.

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Also big ups to my man, bill eyes, and I truly believe that.

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Also big ups to my man, bill.

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He's been coming to the parties since that monica thing and he's always kept me out of trouble.

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First off, I'd like to thank my sponsors, johnson and johnson do you think this is?

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ai, I don't know a lot of things are ai, but yeah that's pretty bad, accurate.

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Do you think that's really his idol, his like?

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mentors.

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Well, r kelly, you see, his daughter just came out and said that he was sexually abusing her, which I?

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I don't know if I should say it, go ahead you already just said so many bad things jennerty.

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I have wondered sir I'm being serious now like people that are pedophiles, yeah, do they like their own kids or other people's kids?

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Because I do wonder that, like I kind of thought your own kid was off limits, because that's like incestual.

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Did you watch?

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Did you watch the Menendez brothers?

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No, oh my gosh.

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So Kim was posting.

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Kim Kardashian time to watch.

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I stay up late.

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Thank you make me look like an idiot.

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I care about selling your home because we're realtors?

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No, I watch it.

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Like you know, I don't like do rubbies and all those weird things that you do.

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Kyle goes to sleep and I watch shows, but the Menendez brothers, the.

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I watched the one on Prime.

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It's more of a documentary that he tells from prison, but the one on.

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Netflix looks like a little bit more like a storyline, but it's awful the things.

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I saw Kim Kardashian saying that she wanted them to be let out and I was like like no, they killed their parents.

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Okay, watching the Amazon special.

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Yeah, it's crazy, because they were sexually abusing them Like horribly Did mom too.

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The mom, knew about it and protected him and then told her to her face I knew about it for years and you're fine, like to toughen up, changed that whole mindset of toughening your kids up because that's what the dad kept telling him.

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I'm toughening you up, this is love.

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This is like it's so sick.

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Yeah, the things that went on and how.

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So then he says the tipping point for the one brother was he was going to go to college and that was his out.

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His dad wasn't going to climb in his room anymore at night.

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And this is like he's 18 and pretty built, but his dad had such control over him so he was so excited to go away to college and his dad said you're not going anywhere, you're not leaving.

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And they got in a fight and then he was like my life's over, I'm never getting out.

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So then some big fight happened and he told the other brother the both brothers were being molested and abused, but they never discussed it together till they were like 18 or 20, right before the murders.

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And it started when they were little, little, like seven, like bleeding and like couldn't walk, all the things Like really bad.

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The mom knew, yeah, and then what's even crazier is the family is speaking up about it.

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Yeah, so in their first trial it's crazy the things that have happened and that they're getting away with.

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So in their first trial they talked about all the abuse for years and they so in their first trial they talked about all the abuse for years and they had all their family members come talk about it.

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And all the family members are still close with the brothers because they knew they were being abused, right like they didn't find fault that they did.

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No, they would be in their house and they knew that they.

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When the dad goes in the bedroom, you don't go over there.

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But I guess years ago you didn't like speak up.

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It wasn't like a thing.

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Child abuse was very like hush hush.

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So they didn't know what to do and they were living with them, so they just knew.

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They should all be charged, I know, and they could hear screams coming from the rooms, like the family members, like the aunt and the uncle.

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Yeah, that's like an accessory to abuse Right and like these kids are like it's so sad.

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But anyways, they all talked about the abuse very clearly and that's when they their first trial.

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They had a hung jury because they couldn't say without a reasonable doubt.

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So the next court case, the judge took out all abuse.

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It wasn't allowed to be discussed.

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Why Right?

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It's crazy that the judge did this because he didn't feel like it was a reason for self-defense or something.

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It was weird how they justified it.

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So then of course they got tried because, without saying about the abuse but what happened is the two brothers told each other that the abuse was happening.

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Then the mom said I've known and you're fine and and then it really made him go crazy that his mom knew all these years and allowed it to go on.

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Yeah, made him feel like both of them.

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So then they thought their parents were planning to kill them.

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So that's why it was like self-defense they.

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They took them on this boat in the middle of nowhere and they thought they were going to push them off the boat.

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And then one night they said you both need to be home by this time and so that's the night that they did it because they're like they're going to kill us.

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This is our only way to survive.

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Yeah, so the Prime Video one is real crazy.

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Are they alive still?

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They're in jail.

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One of them's married.

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They got married in jail and like they lead, like they've done really good things supposedly with their life, like they lead these support groups and stuff.

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Well, that's what I was going to say.

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I kind of almost think it's better that they're in jail, because I don't know how normal you would be.

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They're pretty normal.

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It's crazy.

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The wife spoke.

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They've been married 20 years.

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Yeah, having a normal family.

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You know what I mean.

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Yeah, I don't know, though.

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After 30 years, do you think they should be let out?

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I think they've done their time.

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Yeah, they lived in prison for 18 years before.

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No, I'm saying it was like maybe like protection.

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Yeah, because like if they would have had kids, who knows what would have happened?

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Because a lot of times that's what happens.

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The abused becomes the ab the younger brother because that's all he knew is love.

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That's what I mean.

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Yeah, so like they moved on when they got tried and convicted, they moved on just to torture him more.

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So the other brother went away to another prison and they grew up like twins.

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Yeah, it's real sad, that's awful, it was sad, but I'm all well.

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That's depressing so I do think that it happens within the family, like you were saying yeah, but I was listening to Dr Laura.

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One guy called in and he was a pedophile and then he was a registered sex offender and then he remarried someone and he ended up one night.

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He said, slipping, he slipped and touched the stepdaughter inappropriately and he was calling because the stepdaughter wants nothing to do with him but the wife and him want to get married again.

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And Dr Laura was like no, she should stay away from you.

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Like this isn't okay To the daughter, it would be so sad that she chose you over.

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And he's like but I just made one mistake, oh no.

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And she's like, but he knows it's a biggie.

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Yeah, so I do think they're okay with their own kids.

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I saw this interview of a guy did I say this last time about the dads or did I just tell you there was this interviewing this like serial sexual um pedophile molester guy and he said he specifically they were like asking him how he picks his targets and he was like I pick the kids that don't have dads in their lives or a strong dad figure he was and it was boys he targeted and he was like yep, if I'm scared of the dad or I know the dad is very present and involved in the kid's life.

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He's like I always targeted the families where there was no strong dad figure and I just thought that was like really cool, so sad, well, and it's just so important, like what a dad figure does in a family.

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Like it's protection too, you know, yeah, um, speaking of on the way, here you were talking about your friend that was talking about dating and he was older, and we were just talking to our other friend that's older in their 40s it was at kevin hart.

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Yeah, so tell that story, because that kind of goes into the dad thing too yeah, well, we were talking to our friend who's our age 40s and he was saying that he's single and the girls, the young ladies, want to date him, like the 20s 20s, and they're.

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It's like this new fad.

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Yeah, and I had no idea this was so do you think you had mommy issues and that's why you like the little boys?

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I did have mommy issues.

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I'm like is this counseling?

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This is an intervention totally yeah.

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No, maybe that's why you like the younger boys, because you did have mommy I, I don't like the younger boys.

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Yeah, you do no, you do no.

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I liked one guy, kristen Cavalieri, and she liked him too.

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So when we went to Justin Bieber, though, can you tell you like Justin Bieber too, and you don't have mommy issues I love Justin Bieber.

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I don't like him anymore.

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He's too.

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What happened with Ben, your husband?

00:13:21.621 --> 00:13:22.344
What he told you?

00:13:22.344 --> 00:13:24.648
No, you told that already I did.

00:13:24.648 --> 00:13:25.568
It's so funny.

00:13:25.568 --> 00:13:27.253
You really thought you guys were going to hook up that night.

00:13:27.393 --> 00:13:27.894
I know Justin.

00:13:27.913 --> 00:13:29.302
Bieber doesn't want me, he's got Haley.

00:13:29.302 --> 00:13:32.961
You told all of us after the concert that he did and that you guys had a connection.

00:13:32.961 --> 00:13:36.466
When he was on stage, I think I had had some drinks and I think you took off your shirt.

00:13:36.525 --> 00:13:41.695
No, no, I do take my shirt off a lot though.

00:13:41.715 --> 00:13:43.096
But at the concert you did.

00:13:43.096 --> 00:13:45.159
No I think it was at the concert.

00:13:45.159 --> 00:13:47.307
I think it was at the concert because you came in and told us I know.

00:13:47.881 --> 00:13:48.884
We sat in different.

00:13:48.884 --> 00:13:49.346
Well, good thing.

00:13:49.366 --> 00:13:50.009
Ben doesn't listen.

00:13:50.009 --> 00:13:54.288
We sat in different sections and Melissa and I had a great old time, like just a happy concert.

00:13:54.288 --> 00:14:07.725
I was with Megan we should call Megan and Oscar and then you came out and said I might have had a connection.

00:14:07.620 --> 00:14:09.530
But the weirder part is, ben told you why are you wearing a thong to the justin bieber concert, like he's gonna see your underwear.

00:14:09.530 --> 00:14:09.852
I always wear thongs.

00:14:09.852 --> 00:14:10.404
It's like if I wasn't wearing a thong.

00:14:10.426 --> 00:14:13.032
I know, yeah do you wear granny panties when you go certain places?

00:14:13.032 --> 00:14:14.583
I don't even own a pair, so what?

00:14:14.583 --> 00:14:15.729
Would no underwear have been better?

00:14:15.729 --> 00:14:19.964
I don't know it was just weird maybe you thought you were going to be one of the groupies in the back little did you know?

00:14:19.984 --> 00:14:21.025
you did take off your shirt.

00:14:21.125 --> 00:14:22.028
Good thing it wasn't your pants.

00:14:22.187 --> 00:14:22.769
Yeah, but I don't.

00:14:22.769 --> 00:14:24.732
I wasn't near Justin when the shirt came off.

00:14:24.732 --> 00:14:27.085
I think I was just being funny, so maybe that is why you like younger.

00:14:27.186 --> 00:14:28.260
I'm like Kyle, like I.

00:14:28.260 --> 00:14:30.528
I just like to make people laugh when I have a few yeah.

00:14:30.528 --> 00:14:33.149
So anyways, you, you people.

00:14:33.149 --> 00:14:56.071
So then we went to Kevin Hart this weekend, which was really funny, and the opening acts there was three opening acts was our age and he was talking about this whole thing, how all these he's 44 and he said all these 25 year olds are wanting to date him like more than the older, and he was like I can't keep up with him, I'm tired, but it's just what does he mean by that like in the bedroom?

00:14:56.130 --> 00:14:57.543
no, he meant just like running around.

00:14:57.623 --> 00:15:02.245
Yes, running around he's like I'm ready for bed at nine o'clock, which I really identify with that because I'm so ready for bed.

00:15:02.245 --> 00:15:05.011
But but isn't that weird that this is going?

00:15:05.111 --> 00:15:05.331
on now.

00:15:05.331 --> 00:15:07.024
Do you think it's a lack of male figure?

00:15:08.128 --> 00:15:08.490
Maybe.

00:15:08.490 --> 00:15:14.590
Yeah Well, I think our friend that was telling us said there was like some guy that was like dating younger women and now it's like a fad.

00:15:15.374 --> 00:15:16.158
Oh, like a cool guy.

00:15:16.158 --> 00:15:20.100
Yeah, like Justin Bieber, but not Justin Bieber, yeah like it was like a thing yeah, I can't.

00:15:20.140 --> 00:15:20.721
Yeah, that's sad.

00:15:20.881 --> 00:15:21.582
Daddy issues are a.

00:15:21.582 --> 00:15:21.844
Thing.

00:15:22.544 --> 00:15:24.407
But why are they dating the older guys?

00:15:24.967 --> 00:15:27.871
Well, I think they want like a protector and like money.

00:15:27.871 --> 00:15:30.315
So I was watching, oh gosh.

00:15:30.335 --> 00:15:35.030
Kevin Hart and the younger guys are kind of like feminine nowadays, have you noticed?

00:15:35.030 --> 00:15:39.221
Yeah, Like in the 20s, Like who Like?

00:15:39.221 --> 00:15:40.927
There's just a lot that I wouldn't.

00:15:40.927 --> 00:15:43.443
Maybe I maybe would go for an older, so you don't like Metro.

00:15:44.004 --> 00:15:44.787
No, I don't like Metro.

00:15:44.787 --> 00:15:45.488
You don't like Metro.

00:15:45.488 --> 00:15:47.051
You don't think Ben has a little Metro in him?

00:15:47.051 --> 00:15:47.893
Totally.

00:15:47.893 --> 00:15:50.764
Yeah, I know you just said you don't like it.

00:15:50.904 --> 00:15:56.285
I have the funniest story I can't tell Her husband's Ben and he does have a little Metro to him.

00:15:56.285 --> 00:15:59.092
I have the worst story he's gonna get married 10 plus years.

00:16:07.539 --> 00:16:07.780
How long?

00:16:07.780 --> 00:16:09.046
15 years, oh, 15 years, I'm sorry, sorry.

00:16:09.066 --> 00:16:10.149
14 okay, so get it right, 15 so.

00:16:10.149 --> 00:16:10.672
But you don't like metro?

00:16:10.672 --> 00:16:11.293
No, he does have a little bit.

00:16:11.313 --> 00:16:13.642
He does have a metro, not a gay vibe, but like uh, you think it's gay, I think gay guys would like him.

00:16:13.642 --> 00:16:14.524
They do.

00:16:14.524 --> 00:16:15.567
So this is my story.

00:16:15.586 --> 00:16:20.785
Okay, I'm gonna tell the story he's gonna get really mad if we're not I'm so sorry go ahead.

00:16:20.785 --> 00:16:23.730
So we went to cj's game last week.

00:16:23.730 --> 00:16:28.024
Was far and on the way home we got food so we stopped to the chick-fil-a drive-thru.

00:16:28.046 --> 00:16:41.206
So ben is like crystal very friendly, too friendly, sometimes shut up you know, and so we, we ordered our food and then we pull up to the where the chick-fil-a, and you know how, there's a guy standing there that hands you.

00:16:41.206 --> 00:16:42.509
You're not just like at the window.

00:16:42.509 --> 00:16:42.711
Yeah.

00:16:42.711 --> 00:16:44.763
Well, bear was like, oh, I want to shake.

00:16:44.763 --> 00:16:46.666
So we had to add the shake on later.

00:16:46.666 --> 00:16:49.509
So ben goes to the guy hey, boss.

00:16:49.509 --> 00:16:54.183
And the guy was like, hey, and they had a connection.

00:16:54.605 --> 00:17:03.620
Yeah, it gave me a weird vibe and I was like so just listen, I already told the story to three of our friends and it's like demasculating, and ben was so mad.

00:17:03.620 --> 00:17:07.153
But I'm telling it on, you know, to thousands of people.

00:17:07.153 --> 00:17:09.480
No, we don't have thousands of listeners, I'm telling it to five listeners.

00:17:09.480 --> 00:17:11.888
So, anyways, so Ben goes.

00:17:11.960 --> 00:17:16.362
Hey boss, I'm sitting right there well, did you think it was like flirting in front of you?

00:17:16.561 --> 00:17:21.567
well, it gave me that feeling and the guy goes, and the guy goes, hey.

00:17:21.567 --> 00:17:27.446
And I was like and the guy goes, and he goes, hey, hey, do you, can we add on like an Oreo shake?

00:17:27.446 --> 00:17:30.148
And the guy was like, yeah, man, I think I can do that.

00:17:30.148 --> 00:17:37.010
And it was just like the exchange was very weird and I was like I was like going like what the hell is going on?

00:17:37.010 --> 00:17:43.249
And so he goes, and then the guy's like okay, and then he was like can I get your card?

00:17:43.249 --> 00:17:45.943
And Ben was like can I get your card?

00:17:45.963 --> 00:17:48.034
and ben was like sat there for a minute like thinking the guy had it and like it was gonna be free.

00:17:48.034 --> 00:17:49.540
Yes, because they had like a thing, I don't know.

00:17:49.540 --> 00:17:50.222
This is horrible.

00:17:50.262 --> 00:17:55.863
So then the guy, goes, so then ben goes oh sorry so ben goes sorry, here's my card, I thought you were gonna take care of it.

00:17:55.863 --> 00:17:56.365
And the guy goes.

00:17:56.365 --> 00:17:58.911
He said that it's so freaking weird.

00:17:58.911 --> 00:18:01.183
And the guy goes I work at chick-fil-a.

00:18:01.183 --> 00:18:07.682
Man, I can't, can't take, I can't do, I can't afford a shake and like, and then the guy walked away and I just go.

00:18:07.682 --> 00:18:08.606
That was really weird.

00:18:08.759 --> 00:18:10.909
Did he have you dress up like a Chick-fil-A worker that night?

00:18:11.260 --> 00:18:13.689
That's what I said, like role play later.

00:18:13.689 --> 00:18:16.086
No, but I was like that was really weird.

00:18:16.086 --> 00:18:16.970
And he goes what do?

00:18:16.990 --> 00:18:18.923
you mean, I go?

00:18:19.063 --> 00:18:20.265
I just I don't think it's.

00:18:20.265 --> 00:18:22.709
Oh gosh, it was so like a weird vibe.

00:18:23.089 --> 00:18:30.961
Like you know, like I was uncomfortable and yeah, I totally think gay guys would love that well that he used to work at starbucks when he was in college with his friends.

00:18:30.961 --> 00:18:35.784
His aunt was a manager there, so she got him and all his friends there and he said like all the time guys would hit on him there.

00:18:35.784 --> 00:18:40.521
He does have that kind of metro, but then he can also be really manly when he's hunting.

00:18:40.521 --> 00:18:44.189
So like I'm more into that so you like the hunting?

00:18:44.288 --> 00:18:45.872
Does he wear like camo in the bedroom?

00:18:45.971 --> 00:18:49.467
Yeah, Wait for real Not in the bedroom, but when he goes hunting.

00:18:50.040 --> 00:18:53.079
I know, but like, do you have him, like put antlers on or something?

00:18:53.079 --> 00:18:56.205
No, we don't role play that Tell them about what you do role play.

00:18:56.579 --> 00:18:57.785
That was a long time ago.

00:19:02.267 --> 00:19:03.388
Kyle tells everybody aboutU.

00:19:03.730 --> 00:19:05.011
I used to have a crush on Stabler.

00:19:05.071 --> 00:19:05.532
I did too.

00:19:05.532 --> 00:19:06.253
He was manly.

00:19:06.433 --> 00:19:09.138
He was so manly and he would like protect her.

00:19:09.138 --> 00:19:12.970
I got it yeah, and like, so we would sometimes be like Stabler like.

00:19:13.960 --> 00:19:21.269
It was weird, though, that you would pretend he was like Stabler save me Someone's performing a sex crime on me.

00:19:22.080 --> 00:19:22.984
This is so wrong.

00:19:22.984 --> 00:19:29.923
No, but it was really weird.

00:19:29.923 --> 00:19:36.583
I think the guy I don't know the fact that you have to say that I was telling CJ, or I was telling the story and CJ heard.

00:19:36.583 --> 00:19:39.922
Her son CJ, her son I don't feel like he would be working at Chick-fil-A.

00:19:39.922 --> 00:19:43.077
I feel like he'd be working at like maybe who If the guy was gay.

00:19:43.077 --> 00:19:47.201
It's not like a why, because Chick-fil-A is kind of more.

00:19:48.042 --> 00:19:48.663
I know, but who cares?

00:19:48.663 --> 00:19:49.203
They don't care.

00:19:49.203 --> 00:19:50.746
Yeah, okay.

00:19:50.746 --> 00:19:53.848
Anyways, have you watched the new season of Love is Blind.

00:19:53.848 --> 00:19:57.051
No, so I was watching it this morning when I was doing laundry.

00:19:58.315 --> 00:19:59.163
Maybe that's why you don't watch TV?

00:19:59.182 --> 00:20:00.354
Yeah, because I don't do laundry.

00:20:01.355 --> 00:20:07.417
So, anyways, the girl was they were dating and it's just so funny to watch the stupid things they say behind the thing.

00:20:07.417 --> 00:20:14.104
But the girl was asking so when we get married, or if we get married, what do you think would be appropriate as far as paying the bills?

00:20:14.104 --> 00:20:17.407
Because this one guy's rich and he keeps telling everybody he's rich, but it's super sad.

00:20:17.407 --> 00:20:22.491
His family died and they all, like three family members, died in a year and he was an only child.

00:20:22.491 --> 00:20:24.261
But Love is Blind is on Netflix.

00:20:24.261 --> 00:20:37.420
It's just a dating show where they don't see each other for six weeks they date behind a wall, yeah, and then they get engaged behind the wall and then they meet in person and they have to get married within 30 days to pick each other before they see have you watched it all the way through yet?

00:20:37.440 --> 00:20:38.484
watched another season.

00:20:38.484 --> 00:20:40.781
Yeah, not all the way through, not the whole you got to get to the ending.

00:20:40.823 --> 00:20:43.636
That's when it's like you can't even believe it's happening yeah, but anyways.

00:20:43.636 --> 00:20:47.422
So in the beginning they're behind the walls and getting to know each other by their values, not their looks.

00:20:47.422 --> 00:20:48.604
It's a cute idea.

00:20:48.604 --> 00:20:54.375
Like, yeah, and a lot of them have stayed married, have kids, like it's worked, like the Bachelor, but better, but anyways.

00:20:54.375 --> 00:20:58.326
So she asked like what do you think is appropriate for as far as like when we pay bills?

00:20:58.326 --> 00:21:01.565
And she's like most guys have said 50-50.

00:21:01.565 --> 00:21:06.825
And he was like, yeah, I'm okay with like I mean, maybe I could pay.

00:21:06.825 --> 00:21:08.048
He's fully rich.

00:21:08.048 --> 00:21:14.551
He's like maybe I can pay for like 60, 40, but I want the girl to have some skin in the game, like we need to pay some bills, right.

00:21:14.551 --> 00:21:19.948
And she was like well, I like to get my hair done and this and that I can contribute a little, but to look good, it costs money.

00:21:19.948 --> 00:21:24.340
And I just thought it was the weirdest thing that most she said all the other guys said 50, 50.

00:21:24.340 --> 00:21:25.923
What do you think is appropriate?

00:21:27.548 --> 00:21:29.738
I'm all 100 zero.

00:21:29.738 --> 00:21:32.803
I'm ready for my.

00:21:32.824 --> 00:21:39.221
That's what I was thinking though I was like I think a guy should totally take care of a woman, like and provide.

00:21:39.221 --> 00:21:43.540
Well, I mean I mean kyle, and I like I help, but it's it's not like.

00:21:43.540 --> 00:21:45.530
He's like do you have the mortgage payment this month?

00:21:45.873 --> 00:21:46.576
no, you know what I mean.

00:21:46.576 --> 00:21:48.580
Yeah, I'm way more traditional in that way.

00:21:48.580 --> 00:21:52.621
Ben pays the bills, and then I feel like tell what you pay for good.

00:21:52.621 --> 00:21:54.656
I didn't work for a long time and now.

00:21:54.656 --> 00:22:01.538
I do work a lot and I pay for vacations now and fun things, and you do help like you help with some things too.

00:22:01.538 --> 00:22:03.163
Yeah, like we did stuff to our house last year.

00:22:03.163 --> 00:22:03.986
I paid for that.

00:22:03.986 --> 00:22:05.439
Yeah, and you pay for your car now.

00:22:05.618 --> 00:22:06.862
Yeah, but it's not like.

00:22:06.862 --> 00:22:09.106
It's not like it's your portion, mine either.

00:22:09.106 --> 00:22:09.686
I'm the same same.

00:22:09.686 --> 00:22:10.887
No, I pay for cushion.

00:22:10.887 --> 00:22:11.729
I help pay off debt.

00:22:11.729 --> 00:22:12.709
That's what my money goes to.

00:22:12.709 --> 00:22:15.490
Not saying it's bad if your husband can't pay all the bills.

00:22:15.490 --> 00:22:16.451
I think that's fine.

00:22:16.451 --> 00:22:17.632
I think things are dynamics.

00:22:17.632 --> 00:22:19.853
Kyle didn't work when he started his company.

00:22:19.853 --> 00:22:22.000
I paid the bills like I think all that's fine.

00:22:22.000 --> 00:22:28.419
Yeah, I just think in dating it's just weird to be like you're gonna pay half, so then when they go on dates, does the guy pay half?

00:22:28.759 --> 00:22:37.191
well, and I think you need to talk about it before you get married, cause I think if you're wanting to be a stay at home mom and be more in the home, you always wanted to be a stay at home mom, totally.

00:22:37.474 --> 00:22:38.077
I think you need.

00:22:38.077 --> 00:22:38.580
Why is that?

00:22:38.580 --> 00:22:40.384
But I said, why did you always cause?

00:22:40.423 --> 00:22:48.419
I never wanted to and I always told Ben that from the very beginning, I was never like I'm going to make all these, I'm going to contribute so much, always want to be one.

00:22:48.419 --> 00:22:54.566
Well, because my mom, I wanted to be a really good mom and just focus on my kids, because I felt like I didn't have that you know.

00:22:54.566 --> 00:22:57.750
So I, that was like always important to me.

00:22:57.750 --> 00:23:07.520
So like when I was dating a guy, if they were like unable to provide financially, that was like that played into wanting to date them so you're a gold digger?

00:23:07.540 --> 00:23:13.131
totally wait, no, but like kind of, kind of, I'm just Totally Wait really no, but like Kind of, kind of.

00:23:13.531 --> 00:23:13.992
I'm just kidding.

00:23:13.992 --> 00:23:17.634
That's so funny because I didn't ever want to be a stay-at-home mom Right.

00:23:18.576 --> 00:23:21.242
But I had to find someone who thought that there was value in that.

00:23:21.242 --> 00:23:22.705
Yeah, does that make sense?

00:23:22.705 --> 00:23:22.886
It?

00:23:22.926 --> 00:23:23.768
wasn't, yeah.

00:23:23.768 --> 00:23:26.737
So I dated guys where I paid for a lot, yeah, and it was stupid.

00:23:26.737 --> 00:23:40.523
And then when I dated a guy before Kyle my husband, I remember and we went on trips and I would like book everything, yeah, and Kyle, my husband, is very debt-free no credit card debt, especially credit card debt very anti-debt.

00:23:40.523 --> 00:23:54.371
So I had gone on this trip with my boyfriend like a few months before and he never paid me back half, which is a huge red flag, not even half, like I paid for the whole trip, yeah, and we were both teachers I'm not giving it away who it is, but we were both teachers.

00:23:54.371 --> 00:23:56.271
So it's not like either one of us really had a lot of money.

00:23:56.271 --> 00:24:04.282
So when Kyle and I started dating and we got engaged, we didn't talk about, like, our financial standing before we got married.

00:24:04.282 --> 00:24:09.480
So I remember the weekend we got engaged, the night before we went to Vegas for Memorial Day and in Vegas we were all having fun.

00:24:09.480 --> 00:24:11.525
And he's like, so, do you have any debt?

00:24:12.346 --> 00:24:14.069
And I was all ooh, such a Kyle thing to say too.

00:24:14.090 --> 00:24:15.673
Yeah, like who says that he's so me.

00:24:15.693 --> 00:24:19.525
I would totally ask that yeah, and like we were all like going out, so it wasn't like You're all.

00:24:19.525 --> 00:24:33.929
I remember being on this trip and being like, ooh, but my parents were very debt free.

00:24:33.929 --> 00:24:44.840
Well, they were like you're paying for your own school, all that, so yeah, and like they had car payments they had, like they both had veneers and they just believe in pay the minimum payment forever, which then caught.

00:24:44.840 --> 00:24:52.866
You know, it was hard on us because we never really had abundance, because when you're paying minimum payment on 20 things, that takes your whole paycheck.

00:24:52.866 --> 00:24:55.107
Yeah, abundance, because when you're paying minimum payment on 20 things, that takes your whole paycheck.

00:24:55.107 --> 00:25:03.138
Yeah, but my brother was very debt free, but I had 60 grand in in college debt from paying for school and I didn't think it was that big of a deal and I swear, when I told Kyle I thought he was gonna give the get the ring back.

00:25:03.159 --> 00:25:04.542
Yeah, like he was like you what?

00:25:04.542 --> 00:25:17.919
And I was like, yeah, I just have 60 grand and credit card and I have like 1500 on a credit card and I think I, uh, I think my car was paid off at the time so I thought, only student loans, that's not that bad.

00:25:17.919 --> 00:25:20.707
You know, I had a paid off car and it was like a newer car and he literally was like wait, really.

00:25:20.707 --> 00:25:25.017
And I remember I want to throw his family under the bus.

00:25:25.017 --> 00:25:30.563
But let's be honest, um, I they didn't love that either that I had student loan debt and it was.

00:25:30.563 --> 00:25:31.744
It was like this big deal.

00:25:33.006 --> 00:25:38.172
But he, when we got engaged, he didn't like that I was making a credit card payment.

00:25:38.172 --> 00:25:39.882
So he was like, why do you have a credit card?

00:25:39.882 --> 00:25:42.041
And I was like, well, I went to Chicago with my ex.

00:25:42.041 --> 00:25:43.326
He never paid me back.

00:25:43.326 --> 00:25:45.711
So Kyle totally paid off the credit card.

00:25:45.711 --> 00:25:46.214
Oh, that's nice.

00:25:46.214 --> 00:25:47.256
And he like totally helped me.

00:25:47.276 --> 00:25:47.895
He's such a gentleman.

00:25:47.895 --> 00:25:53.079
Yeah, like we had to fix up my house to try to get it rented so that we could move in together and he paid for all that.

00:25:53.079 --> 00:25:59.484
Like he was very, always a provider and when we were dating, I remember he thought it was so rude that we would go to dinner.

00:25:59.484 --> 00:26:03.808
Well, I dated these other guys where I paid for everything or they asked me to split it and I just thought it.

00:26:03.808 --> 00:26:07.811
They were never like, I never felt secure with them, I never felt like protected.

00:26:07.811 --> 00:26:20.598
Yeah, and my dad always made me feel safe and secure and I remember when we first went on dates he thought I was like Joe Scottsdale because I wouldn't pull out my wallet and he was like I didn't care that I was paying, but it was rude.

00:26:20.598 --> 00:26:24.359
You didn't even be like let me help and I could say no and I would just be all.

00:26:24.359 --> 00:26:27.595
But I remember I was like I don't want to date a guy that can't pay for me.

00:26:27.595 --> 00:26:31.279
That means he won't provide for me, that means he won't take care of me so you're a gold digger too?

00:26:31.500 --> 00:26:34.924
yeah, basically, but in marriage like you, yeah.

00:26:34.924 --> 00:26:39.238
Like if he's not willing to provide for you, dating, what's like?

00:26:39.238 --> 00:26:41.328
The man is such a provider in so many different ways.

00:26:41.328 --> 00:26:42.454
It's not even just financially.

00:26:42.454 --> 00:26:49.036
Like if something goes down, kyle's gonna take it like yeah I can't say that lightly like I don't know.

00:26:49.036 --> 00:26:52.432
Like when I went on bed rest, I was literally in bed all day.

00:26:52.432 --> 00:26:54.900
Every day Kyle had to do everything for me.

00:26:54.900 --> 00:26:57.326
Yeah, get all the groceries, do every do laundry.

00:26:57.326 --> 00:26:57.955
I couldn't do anything.

00:26:57.955 --> 00:26:59.961
So it's like that same like.

00:26:59.981 --> 00:27:13.448
I feel like a guy like most guys maybe not all guys and nowadays it's weird is that apparently I don't know anything about the, this generation, but I feel like you know a lot about the younger generation they take pride in being able to provide for their family.

00:27:13.448 --> 00:27:18.022
So, like most guys, I feel like like that, like obviously nowadays everything's so expensive.

00:27:18.022 --> 00:27:20.102
A lot of people both people have to work.

00:27:20.221 --> 00:27:21.105
Totally I agree.

00:27:21.615 --> 00:27:28.048
But like I don't think a guy would be happy, most guys like just letting the wife pay for everything.

00:27:28.255 --> 00:27:38.964
Well, and I think there's times where that's okay, like when you're starting a new company, and we have friends where her husband just started a new company, so she's kind of like tagged me in but just permanently being like no, I'm not providing.

00:27:39.075 --> 00:27:47.435
I feel like men like that role, yeah, like that's kind of an innate thing that God made men, I think, a provider, yeah, caretaker.

00:27:47.496 --> 00:27:59.623
When I was paying the bills while Kyle wasyle was building his business, I did feel like this dynamic shift, yeah, like he started calling me mommy, right, and no, I'm just kidding, I was all no, he started leaving cash on the.

00:27:59.742 --> 00:28:00.925
No, it was getting weird.

00:28:00.965 --> 00:28:02.476
But no, I felt like it did take a little.

00:28:02.476 --> 00:28:03.240
I didn't want him to.

00:28:03.240 --> 00:28:05.007
Yeah, I didn't want to demasculate him.

00:28:05.007 --> 00:28:07.256
Right, kyle and I are watching this show.

00:28:07.256 --> 00:28:09.760
It's called the affair on amazon prime.

00:28:09.760 --> 00:28:13.888
Yeah, it's totally a pause and toss kind of show.

00:28:13.888 --> 00:28:15.640
It has moments you know where you're like.

00:28:15.640 --> 00:28:16.622
Oh you know.

00:28:16.622 --> 00:28:18.066
So Kyle loves those shows.

00:28:18.066 --> 00:28:19.981
I'm not saying he's into pause and toss.

00:28:20.102 --> 00:28:25.567
Really no, because it's like I'm into the show and then it's like you know.

00:28:25.976 --> 00:28:30.146
So if you are watching a show and it gets a little, you don't pause.

00:28:30.355 --> 00:28:39.145
No, I'm like, oh, after the show and then I go to sleep because I am in the mood during the show.

00:28:39.266 --> 00:28:42.980
But I don't want to stop the show, you just pause it and then big it back up.

00:28:42.980 --> 00:28:44.483
No, it's never the same.

00:28:44.483 --> 00:28:45.586
No, oh my gosh.

00:28:45.586 --> 00:28:48.020
So in the affair there's been, well, I fall asleep.

00:28:48.020 --> 00:28:52.596
So then I hear like weird sounds and I'm like what are you watching?

00:28:52.596 --> 00:28:54.364
But I forget like we were watching.

00:28:54.384 --> 00:28:59.722
But it's this story about, like, this couple that was so cute with four kids and they go on this family vacation.

00:28:59.722 --> 00:29:02.441
It's old, yeah, it's like from years ago.

00:29:02.441 --> 00:29:10.358
And, um, they go stay with her family and man Montauk and her family has money, yeah, and then he ends up going with this other girl.

00:29:10.358 --> 00:29:13.626
But I feel like part of why the affair started is her.

00:29:13.626 --> 00:29:21.575
She had like a trust, she was like a trust fund, she was like the it girl in high school and I think he always felt demasculated by her, like he always felt beneath her.

00:29:21.575 --> 00:29:25.779
And now with the new girl, who kind of came from nothing, he's like the big deal.

00:29:25.779 --> 00:29:30.724
And now he has this big book deal and he's like flourishing with her, right, and it's like.

00:29:30.786 --> 00:29:35.029
I do think there's that because I'm a strong personality, sometimes I'm like I don't want to take over too much.

00:29:35.029 --> 00:29:37.536
You are, don't be rude, I'm sorry.

00:29:37.536 --> 00:29:38.960
I can't pause right now.

00:29:38.960 --> 00:29:40.763
I don't care if you want to.

00:29:40.763 --> 00:29:42.596
I have to finish my show and go night night.

00:29:42.596 --> 00:29:44.577
Just keep rubbing me for another hour.

00:29:44.577 --> 00:29:50.246
No, I am a strong personality, but I don't want to take away from like the man yeah, making him feel like a big deal.

00:29:50.446 --> 00:29:55.682
Yeah, no, I just think it's every day, every family is different.

00:29:55.682 --> 00:29:57.897
What they like, I feel like.

00:29:57.897 --> 00:30:00.705
For me it was very like.

00:30:00.705 --> 00:30:02.852
I was like I want to be a stay at home mom.

00:30:02.852 --> 00:30:10.501
I need to find a guy that wants to find value in that and I am not going to so would you have married someone if they didn't let you stay home.

00:30:10.501 --> 00:30:12.435
No, I don't think so Really.

00:30:12.435 --> 00:30:14.423
So it's so funny I was on the opposite.

00:30:14.634 --> 00:30:16.442
Kyle wanted me to stay home and I don't want to stay home.

00:30:16.442 --> 00:30:17.518
Yeah, and I didn't like that.

00:30:17.518 --> 00:30:22.035
He was pressuring me into that because I was like I have my career and I am who.

00:30:22.055 --> 00:30:24.884
I am, but you're more driven than I am, you know.

00:30:33.015 --> 00:30:34.539
Like that's just, I wish I was driven in that goal.

00:30:35.221 --> 00:30:46.843
So yeah, yeah, I feel like yeah, no, I did date guys where I paid, like there's some not naming names, but rhymes with pony, or no, no, no, rhymes with bond Sven.

00:30:46.843 --> 00:30:53.156
But um, oh wait, okay, go ahead.

00:30:53.156 --> 00:31:04.913
Anyways, he was like I don't, I don't think he was homeless, but like he was in between homes, it's just like so loser who I was okay, go ahead.

00:31:05.032 --> 00:31:05.513
And what'd you do?

00:31:05.534 --> 00:31:09.759
I know right anyways, he, he didn't work and he was in between homes.

00:31:09.759 --> 00:31:11.820
Yes, okay, okay and so.

00:31:12.280 --> 00:31:15.963
I was when you were had a secret affair yes, that you didn't tell me about.

00:31:15.963 --> 00:31:17.105
I'm all, where'd you go last night?

00:31:17.105 --> 00:31:19.587
She was like salty senorita and I'm like with who?

00:31:19.587 --> 00:31:21.509
So she didn't think I would ask that question.

00:31:21.509 --> 00:31:22.349
And of course I would.

00:31:22.349 --> 00:31:23.951
And what did you say?

00:31:23.951 --> 00:31:24.592
My work friends.

00:31:27.056 --> 00:31:27.996
I don't remember, you don.

00:31:28.135 --> 00:31:28.816
That he's a loser.

00:31:29.435 --> 00:31:34.076
Yeah, anyways, he's a nice person, but not for me, he is a nice person yeah, so, anyways.

00:31:34.076 --> 00:31:42.659
So, yeah so, but I did pay for everything and drove, because I don't think he had a car, or maybe he did have a car, it was just like Why'd you drive.

00:31:43.179 --> 00:31:43.618
I think that.

00:31:43.618 --> 00:31:46.902
Do you think that's normal when we?

00:31:46.902 --> 00:31:51.800
We we've talked about this, we've I've talked to many girls about this and we just talked to one of my.

00:31:51.942 --> 00:31:52.963
I'm just more traditional.

00:31:52.963 --> 00:31:57.042
I don't want to drive the guy like we just talked to a girl who's dating.

00:31:57.565 --> 00:31:58.869
That's a good friend of mine.

00:31:58.869 --> 00:32:03.365
Remember we were at the house and we were on speaker and she wanted her guy she's dating.

00:32:03.365 --> 00:32:07.163
Because this is the whole thing, right, you have the dating, the talking, talking, dating.

00:32:07.163 --> 00:32:12.693
Then, like, so she's not in the official stage yet, yes, and she was going out of town and she wanted he.

00:32:12.693 --> 00:32:14.136
He offered to pick her up at the airport.

00:32:14.136 --> 00:32:16.221
Right, because she had already picked him up at the airport.

00:32:16.221 --> 00:32:21.221
Yes, and, and she felt bad that she didn't want him to have to use his gas money.

00:32:21.221 --> 00:32:27.759
And we were like, if he can't spend gas money on you, how would he be a provider as a man in your life?

00:32:27.759 --> 00:32:28.361
Right?

00:32:28.422 --> 00:32:32.808
like and, more importantly, why are you not valuing yourself enough to feel that you're worth him?

00:32:32.808 --> 00:32:43.357
A few gas money yeah, and picking you up, yeah, like I make ben do crazy things all day, every day he made like past tense or make current, past, all of it.

00:32:43.377 --> 00:32:46.104
Future, all of it.

00:32:46.104 --> 00:32:50.413
But I'm just saying I'm like hey, I need you to get this, I need you to do this like.

00:32:50.413 --> 00:32:51.924
And he's doing all like.

00:32:51.924 --> 00:32:53.911
I'm so inconvenient all the time.

00:32:53.911 --> 00:32:59.092
I'm never worried about being an inconvenience, because I am an inconvenience and like, but he is to you as well.

00:32:59.092 --> 00:33:00.173
I feel like it goes both ways.

00:33:00.173 --> 00:33:01.924
Oh yeah, he's like, I forgot a meal.

00:33:01.924 --> 00:33:03.226
I'm driving a meal to him.

00:33:10.309 --> 00:33:14.076
Yeah, one of my exes ironically the same ex that we just talked about.

00:33:14.076 --> 00:33:20.969
We were at a wedding and we've talked about this a lot and our kids are just starting to date or talk whatever it is.

00:33:20.969 --> 00:33:21.891
So it's like super weird.

00:33:21.891 --> 00:33:22.712
We talk about it all the time.

00:33:22.712 --> 00:33:38.237
But so we were fully boyfriend and girlfriend and, like years in at this point, my parents didn't love him and so in the beginning we would fight and he would tell me your parents are controlling and this and that, because that's what happens in a relationship they try to control your mind, isolate you, yes, and isolate you.

00:33:38.480 --> 00:33:41.188
I didn't hang with my friends as much, I didn't hang with my family as much.

00:33:41.188 --> 00:33:42.921
I was believing what he was telling me.

00:33:42.921 --> 00:33:53.278
And then, um, my parents started were always say they didn't like him, they like him, and then decided my brother told him we got to stop saying it because it's driving her towards them, and it was so.

00:33:53.278 --> 00:33:57.601
Then my parents started to just be okay, my brother, they would just be accepting of him and they would be nice to him.

00:33:57.601 --> 00:34:02.311
And then, when I saw him not being nice back, I was like he's the problem.

00:34:02.311 --> 00:34:06.990
Yeah, so one night we were at a wedding and my family was there and they were going to leave.

00:34:06.990 --> 00:34:13.202
And they said to him hey, and they were going to leave.

00:34:13.202 --> 00:34:15.268
And they said to him, hey, make sure you take care of her tonight and get her home safe.

00:34:15.268 --> 00:34:15.972
And he said I'll do what I can.

00:34:15.972 --> 00:34:17.958
And that didn't make them feel super secure and my dad almost popped him in the face.

00:34:17.958 --> 00:34:18.440
That's what I'm saying.

00:34:19.039 --> 00:34:20.822
Someone's about to bet about kidding me, yeah, like everybody.

00:34:20.862 --> 00:34:21.744
There was beverages.

00:34:21.744 --> 00:34:32.172
Like there's people, yeah, like it's a big thing, like when you leave and it's to drive to say take care of her tonight and get her home safe, even if you're not planning on it just lie and say oh yeah, I got her.

00:34:32.452 --> 00:34:34.514
Like who says, no, I'll do what I can.

00:34:34.514 --> 00:34:35.416
Yeah, just to spite.

00:34:35.416 --> 00:34:40.460
It was just to like, yeah, be a dick, yeah.

00:34:40.460 --> 00:34:41.443
So that's, that was the beginning to the end.

00:34:41.443 --> 00:34:42.744
I think we broke up like two weeks later, yeah.

00:34:42.744 --> 00:34:43.724
And then I met Kyle, like six weeks later.

00:34:43.724 --> 00:34:44.945
Yeah, it's crazy how that works.

00:34:44.945 --> 00:34:48.389
But, yeah, if he can't pay for gas money, he can't get you home safe from a wedding.

00:34:48.389 --> 00:34:56.527
That same guy, though we, I remember one night I was driving home I tell this story all the time, probably already told it, but I want young listeners to listen to this.

00:34:56.527 --> 00:34:58.952
I remember I we were driving home.

00:34:58.952 --> 00:34:59.940
It was like 1030 at night.

00:34:59.940 --> 00:35:04.985
I was following him to like we were going to my house or something, which, again, was stupid.

00:35:04.985 --> 00:35:08.050
The ex that I keep telling these stories about, yeah, same ex.

00:35:08.250 --> 00:35:09.130
Hopefully he doesn't listen?

00:35:09.931 --> 00:35:12.514
He might, but he's happy and everything worked out the way it's meant to.

00:35:12.514 --> 00:35:13.536
Yeah, we just weren't meant to be.

00:35:13.536 --> 00:35:20.385
But he, I it was like 10.30 at night and we were going to go to my house and I was like I got to get gas and he's like, okay, I'll just see you at your house.

00:35:20.385 --> 00:35:34.894
And I thought it my own gas, like my dad would never do that, yeah, and so I kind of was annoyed at him, you know, when you're already fighting all the time, and I was like you're gonna have me go to the gas station by myself.

00:35:34.894 --> 00:35:35.936
He's like what you can't pump?

00:35:35.936 --> 00:35:39.260
And they, they do this, they manipulate you can't pump your own gas.

00:35:39.260 --> 00:35:42.411
And then you're like, are you the kind of girl that needs a guy to do everything for you?

00:35:42.411 --> 00:35:45.605
And then you believe it and you're like, yeah, well, no, I can pump my own gas.

00:35:45.605 --> 00:35:49.291
I'm because this pro womenwomen's movement like, oh, we don't need a guy.

00:35:49.291 --> 00:35:53.405
Yeah, I need a guy, we do, I need a guy every day and you really need it for the.

00:35:53.699 --> 00:35:57.025
I need it for a lot of things the coffee, the laundry, the no.

00:35:57.887 --> 00:35:59.202
Yeah, that too, anyways.

00:35:59.202 --> 00:36:05.307
So I remember when Kyle and I were newly dating one night it was only like 830 and we were going somewhere and I was like I got to get gas.

00:36:05.307 --> 00:36:06.809
He to the gas station.

00:36:06.809 --> 00:36:07.949
He just said it like that.

00:36:07.969 --> 00:36:08.610
You just like knew.

00:36:08.791 --> 00:36:15.655
Yeah, and it was like the moment where I was like, oh my gosh, he's so for me, because the ex would always manipulate me and be like you want to be a princess?

00:36:15.655 --> 00:36:17.336
You think you know I should?

00:36:17.336 --> 00:36:18.036
Right.

00:36:18.117 --> 00:36:24.820
And then you start questioning your, your values or the things that are important to you, because they're not in line with them.

00:36:24.940 --> 00:36:25.541
Yeah, yeah.

00:36:25.702 --> 00:36:26.463
But you weren't crazy.

00:36:26.463 --> 00:36:28.708
You just needed to find a guy who liked doing.

00:36:28.728 --> 00:36:42.909
Yeah, and like with kyle, like even my family, a lot of guys didn't have a very strong family life and my family was very close, is very close, but you know we just lost my dad last year, so it changes things a little bit, but we would always go to dinners and we would always do all this fun thing and all my friends loved that.

00:36:42.909 --> 00:36:44.222
I had this cool family right.

00:36:44.222 --> 00:36:46.646
They all like remember you would come to dinner with us all the time.

00:36:46.646 --> 00:36:52.215
My family was like everybody was always at my house and I remember a lot of guys would be like your family's controlling.

00:36:52.215 --> 00:36:58.182
They want to control your every move, and I would believe I'd be like, yeah, you're right, they are kind of controlling, whereas Kyle would be like, what's your family doing tonight?

00:36:58.364 --> 00:37:05.826
Yeah, and it just like his family was just as involved as my family and I didn't have to like change him and make him buy into the things that mattered to me.

00:37:05.826 --> 00:37:11.112
Yeah, and I mean you got Ben to agree with you know she likes the back door more than the front.

00:37:11.112 --> 00:37:11.393
No, I don't.

00:37:11.393 --> 00:37:12.695
And that took a little convincing.

00:37:12.695 --> 00:37:13.556
I'm not a back door girl.

00:37:13.556 --> 00:37:18.052
It took a little convincing because it made him feel like the guy at Chick-fil-A, no yeah.

00:37:18.521 --> 00:37:19.706
I can't believe I told that story.

00:37:19.706 --> 00:37:22.922
He's going to be so mad, did it?

00:37:22.961 --> 00:37:23.605
come out wrong.

00:37:23.605 --> 00:37:26.344
I mean it came out right.

00:37:26.344 --> 00:37:28.527
Right, it's not that bad, he's not into that.

00:37:28.527 --> 00:37:30.873
No, no he's not but the guy we don't know.

00:37:30.873 --> 00:37:36.159
Well, I think, like I said, a lot of guys would like ben, but anyways, so with the right guy it should be easy.

00:37:36.159 --> 00:37:43.327
But I do think the pro women's movement kind of changes things, especially like in reality tv and shows well, so many girls don't have these standards.

00:37:43.367 --> 00:37:45.081
So then the guys aren't doing these things.

00:37:45.081 --> 00:37:50.230
So then what happens is, when they meet a girl that expects this, they're not to it.

00:37:50.230 --> 00:37:54.483
And they're threatened and they tell them all these things, but it's like no, you just need to wait until you find the guy.

00:37:54.483 --> 00:37:56.509
That is Matches, where it just clicks.

00:37:56.710 --> 00:38:03.309
Right, dr Laura always says Dr Laura Schlesinger, we talk about her all the time, but on her podcast she talks about that today.

00:38:03.309 --> 00:38:12.052
Dating is like free prostitution, Because back in the day, especially back back in the day, you didn't have sex until you were married, unless you were like a slut.

00:38:12.052 --> 00:38:14.313
Do you use the word slore ever?

00:38:14.313 --> 00:38:17.596
Totally, I said the word sort of my cheerleaders before homecoming.

00:38:17.596 --> 00:38:18.715
I was like don't be a slore.

00:38:18.715 --> 00:38:20.177
And they were like what's a floor?

00:38:20.297 --> 00:38:23.485
oh my gosh no, it are my friend's birthday.

00:38:23.485 --> 00:38:24.427
Last year was a year ago.

00:38:24.427 --> 00:38:29.686
This time I said the word slore and they're like that's a made-up word and I'm like that's a full word, it's both.

00:38:29.907 --> 00:38:31.291
Don't be a slut Don't be a whore.

00:38:31.291 --> 00:38:32.634
Don't be a whore, it's like a super slut.

00:38:32.920 --> 00:38:33.905
You're so slutty.

00:38:33.905 --> 00:38:38.222
Slut doesn't even cover it, so I literally pulled out my phone and Googled it.

00:38:38.222 --> 00:38:38.442
You did.

00:38:38.442 --> 00:38:39.663
It's like an urban dictionary.

00:38:39.663 --> 00:38:40.483
It's a full term.

00:38:40.543 --> 00:38:43.125
Oh, the girls were it's, so it's a full term.

00:38:43.125 --> 00:38:45.465
Don't be a whore.

00:38:46.146 --> 00:38:47.748
It's disgusting.

00:38:47.748 --> 00:38:50.268
I feel, like that was a big term back in our day.

00:38:50.268 --> 00:38:51.269
Yeah, what's the new term?

00:38:51.269 --> 00:38:52.570
Oh, I don't know, gosh.

00:38:53.110 --> 00:38:54.072
Anyways.

00:38:54.072 --> 00:39:01.277
So Dr Laura said you know, in the day they used to have to marry you to have sex, yeah, and it was like this big thing.

00:39:01.277 --> 00:39:06.083
And you got married young because everybody wanted to have sex Right.

00:39:06.083 --> 00:39:08.507
Traditionally you'd have to date, you'd have to wait.

00:39:08.507 --> 00:39:11.253
Guy would really have to hunt the girl down like court him, yeah.

00:39:11.253 --> 00:39:17.605
And then that's why prostitution was so big, because if a guy wasn't in a relationship he couldn't have sex right, so he would go pay for it.

00:39:18.166 --> 00:39:24.789
But nowadays, on these new tinder and all the things she says, like you go to dinner, you don't even have to pay for the dinner.

00:39:24.789 --> 00:39:31.789
You you split it because, remember, we don't need a man and we can pay 50 and then the girl has sex with him just because he took her.

00:39:31.789 --> 00:39:32.811
He didn't even take her to dinner.

00:39:32.811 --> 00:39:37.085
They met at dinner, she paid for her own dinner and then she just does it with him.

00:39:37.085 --> 00:39:39.090
Because women think that that's connection.

00:39:39.800 --> 00:39:46.539
And I always tell like younger, younger, older girls, like my old cheerleaders that are older, or girls that are dating that ask us for advice.

00:39:46.539 --> 00:39:47.684
And it kind of does happen a lot.

00:39:47.684 --> 00:39:56.748
They do ask us for advice, but I said it's just a hole, like it's not like it's diamonds on your hole.

00:39:56.748 --> 00:39:58.014
Yeah, what makes that thing so precious is it's hard to get in.

00:39:58.014 --> 00:39:58.777
Yeah, like if everyone's getting in it.

00:39:58.777 --> 00:40:00.621
It's not like what you're doing with your hips is that magical.

00:40:00.621 --> 00:40:02.043
We all have hips, we all move them Right.

00:40:02.043 --> 00:40:03.405
We all have the same things.

00:40:03.405 --> 00:40:04.565
Yeah, it's just a hole.

00:40:04.565 --> 00:40:05.788
I mean, they look different.

00:40:05.788 --> 00:40:06.708
We learned that that last week.

00:40:06.708 --> 00:40:12.076
There's innies, there's outies, there's uppies, there's downies, there's hangies, there's lowies, there's tuckies, there's not.

00:40:12.076 --> 00:40:14.398
But it's not what like?

00:40:14.398 --> 00:40:16.829
Even when you kiss someone, it's not like what they do with their tongue.

00:40:16.829 --> 00:40:17.472
That makes it good.

00:40:17.472 --> 00:40:23.190
Right, like Kyle and I waited, especially being older, we waited like a few weeks to kiss, which is a lot so do we?

00:40:23.251 --> 00:40:30.697
it was like four dates, and by then I it was like fumes, like it was like and I've also kissed a guy at a bar and it's it's like.

00:40:30.697 --> 00:40:32.119
You know, it's nothing.

00:40:32.119 --> 00:40:44.489
But when I waited with Kyle to kiss him and we dated and like I respected him right, and I was dying to have that kiss, like even at the movies, I remember we were like 20, we were old, and we were sitting there like this the whole time and I was like I didn't even watch the movie.

00:40:44.489 --> 00:40:47.884
I was like put my hand, put your hand on my leg, put your hand on my leg like all I thought about.

00:40:47.923 --> 00:41:00.456
You can like feel the like tension yeah, but that's like so fun, yeah, is to do that and then have the kiss and then wait to do the sex, and it's so much more magical when you have earned respect and loved rather than.

00:41:00.456 --> 00:41:16.204
That's why guys these days they have to do all these freaky things to get like off, yeah, because there's no emotional connection, there's no work at it, there's nothing that makes that whole precious yeah, I just told ken, because she was telling me about a girl at school that she knows that was kissing, making out.

00:41:16.844 --> 00:41:17.847
And what grade is ken?

00:41:17.847 --> 00:41:19.190
In eighth, eighth grade.

00:41:19.190 --> 00:41:33.492
And I was like oh my gosh, and I was like telling her, hey, dad, and I went on four dates like or it might even have been more- than that because you were doing what I was doing, yeah, and well, the dates weren't like back to back, it was like a week and we were talking in between.

00:41:33.492 --> 00:41:36.670
It was like a month of yeah, or maybe even longer but both of I had.

00:41:36.831 --> 00:41:40.143
Both of us have done it the other way many, many times, but then it was we were

00:41:40.184 --> 00:41:40.505
learning.

00:41:40.505 --> 00:41:41.527
It was getting us nowhere.

00:41:41.527 --> 00:42:00.690
So let's go back to the old school rules and then he was so excited when we did kiss, and I was because at that point we had developed real feelings for each other and like I was trying to tell her I'm like your first kiss, you should be in love, you should be in a committed relationship like this isn't something you just do with some guy, you know yeah, well, and then you never get one back.

00:42:00.940 --> 00:42:10.027
I remember some of our friends that we're friends with now did, would I it's funny because I'm not gonna say her name, but they would do spin the bottle in like fourth grade yeah, and they and they would come to my window.

00:42:10.027 --> 00:42:16.246
They'd knock, like because Saved by the Bell was in back then, and remember they would like oh, kelly's window, throw rocks and go to the window.

00:42:16.246 --> 00:42:19.449
So like they would come to my window and be like we got a bottle, want to play.

00:42:19.449 --> 00:42:27.471
And I remember my parents did install good values in me and I totally watched.

00:42:27.471 --> 00:42:38.130
But I remember one time I was at a party and they were all playing spin the bottle in the bushes, and this was like in fifth grade and I had to go use the house phone with the long cord, you know and I was trying to get out of there and I couldn't.

00:42:38.130 --> 00:42:43.130
All the parents were drinking inside and I remember being like scared because it was like no, and that happens.

00:42:43.219 --> 00:42:44.501
That's where this kiss happened.

00:42:44.501 --> 00:42:47.545
The parents, yeah, and I'm like what is going on.

00:42:47.565 --> 00:42:48.646
So how long had they been dating?

00:42:49.186 --> 00:42:51.188
Like a day, a day, but anyways.

00:42:51.588 --> 00:42:53.331
But the parents are there, where was your first kiss?

00:42:54.452 --> 00:42:55.713
Where, when High school.

00:42:55.733 --> 00:42:56.193
How old were you?

00:42:56.335 --> 00:42:57.695
Junior, you were junior.

00:42:57.715 --> 00:43:03.231
Sophomore, so that one guy, we'll call him Bon yeah, was your first kiss.

00:43:03.231 --> 00:43:14.195
Yeah, and that was young now, but back then it wasn't Right and I know like some girls these days get made fun of if they don't have a first kiss.

00:43:14.195 --> 00:43:22.043
But I also do feel like kids are better than well, the kids that were around, yeah, because like a lot of Maddie's friends, no one's had a first kiss and they're in high school, right.

00:43:22.403 --> 00:43:23.025
Well, the parents.

00:43:23.025 --> 00:43:25.989
I feel like there was more opportunity when I was younger.

00:43:25.989 --> 00:43:26.708
I just never had.

00:43:26.728 --> 00:43:30.574
Yeah, cause you were out to the streetlights, came home Nowadays we weren't tracking.

00:43:30.574 --> 00:43:31.074
Where are you at?

00:43:31.074 --> 00:43:31.454
What are?

00:43:31.474 --> 00:43:32.195
you doing my kids?

00:43:32.195 --> 00:43:34.786
They don't know, they can't even breathe without me knowing where they are?

00:43:35.079 --> 00:43:39.731
Were you allowed to go in the room with your boyfriend in high school In the bedroom At his house.

00:43:39.731 --> 00:43:40.612
Yeah, not at your house.

00:43:40.612 --> 00:43:46.286
Did he ever go to your house there?

00:43:46.447 --> 00:43:48.489
no, he wasn't even allowed by my house.

00:43:48.530 --> 00:43:50.634
We were allowed to go in my room, but we had to keep the door open.

00:43:51.153 --> 00:43:53.717
And let me tell you that door open didn't stop us from a thing.

00:43:53.717 --> 00:43:54.378
Yeah, no.

00:43:54.478 --> 00:43:57.510
So I'm like so worried about now that we're dating all this stuff.

00:43:57.510 --> 00:44:07.704
I'm like, oh my gosh, you know, my oldest likes someone, but they're only talking and I was like, don't kiss him till it's official, like make him work, because once you get, once you have your first kiss, then you've already had a first kiss.

00:44:07.704 --> 00:44:12.210
Yeah, and then don't do what you did with no, no, that's horrible.

00:44:12.331 --> 00:44:14.673
Don't do what you did with the multiples first kiss.

00:44:14.673 --> 00:44:16.420
You know multiple guys at one time.

00:44:16.782 --> 00:44:20.971
You know one guy no, but I'm serious, make that stuff be different.

00:44:20.971 --> 00:44:23.786
Yeah, because once you start slurring around, you're no one special.

00:44:23.786 --> 00:44:25.010
No, that sounds bad.

00:44:25.010 --> 00:44:26.135
That's sad, I know.

00:44:26.135 --> 00:44:27.960
Have you ever slurred around?

00:44:27.960 --> 00:44:28.963
No, yeah, you did.

00:44:28.963 --> 00:44:33.614
No, she did, and she didn't feel good about herself, and I did too, and I didn't feel good about myself.

00:44:33.614 --> 00:44:35.460
That's why we locked it up with our husbands.

00:44:35.460 --> 00:44:37.371
I'm not on Kristen Cavallari's podcast, I don't have to be honest.

00:44:37.391 --> 00:44:38.315
Let's be liars.

00:44:38.315 --> 00:44:38.940
Let's be liars.

00:44:38.940 --> 00:44:41.583
Speaking of liars, I feel like you should lie to your kids.

00:44:42.344 --> 00:44:44.907
We were so.

00:44:44.947 --> 00:44:48.371
I had a boob job at 18.

00:44:48.371 --> 00:44:50.094
And then, good choice.

00:44:50.094 --> 00:44:51.715
It was a horrible choice.

00:44:52.440 --> 00:44:57.570
I tried to tell you my mom had boob jobs growing up, and so I thought that's the thing is, you do what your parents do, I know.

00:44:57.570 --> 00:44:58.963
So this is why you should lie.

00:44:58.963 --> 00:45:01.684
Yeah, so anyways, I agree, I'm on the fence about it.

00:45:01.684 --> 00:45:02.166
Yes, go ahead.

00:45:02.166 --> 00:45:07.766
So, to an extent, so anyways was always like, oh, she had three boob jobs.

00:45:07.766 --> 00:45:10.190
So I was like, oh yeah, you get old enough and you get a boob job.

00:45:10.190 --> 00:45:11.612
So I was 18 and I got a boob job.

00:45:11.612 --> 00:45:12.233
It's stupid.

00:45:12.233 --> 00:45:13.934
I was not mature enough to get a boob job.

00:45:13.934 --> 00:45:14.902
I had boobs.

00:45:14.902 --> 00:45:18.570
It was the worst decision ever and it was all for the wrong reasons.

00:45:18.570 --> 00:45:27.409
Not saying like, after you breastfeed kids, you want to lift, you want a boob job, get a boob job.

00:45:27.409 --> 00:45:40.570
She's saying that because I have didn't want to tell my daughter that I had a boob job, because I didn't want her to think that you grow up and you get a boob job, like your mom, yeah, and your body's not perfect, so I always just acted like I had huge boobs.

00:45:40.880 --> 00:45:44.891
So she had big boobs, like a little bit smaller than mine, you can probably see them, yeah.

00:45:44.891 --> 00:45:46.452
And then it's like this within a week.

00:45:46.932 --> 00:45:50.675
So then I decided to get an explant because I was like I want nothing out.

00:45:50.675 --> 00:45:51.536
But what did you tell her?

00:45:51.536 --> 00:45:57.146
Because you didn't tell her you had a boob job no, so my mom did this same stupid thing I was like I want nothing unnatural in my body.

00:45:57.146 --> 00:46:01.126
So I had to tell my kids, all my kids, because none of them think I've had a boob job at this point.

00:46:01.126 --> 00:46:08.608
So I said mom is getting a breast reduction my mom, oh my gosh my mom's, oh, your mom you're.

00:46:08.668 --> 00:46:13.135
So my mom, my mom, I went to spend the night in my best friend's house once and she calls me.

00:46:13.135 --> 00:46:18.144
Hey, I'm in the hospital and I'm like huh, she's like the doctor found some tumors, which is so scary.

00:46:18.144 --> 00:46:20.692
Yeah, like I'm like what you're dying.

00:46:20.692 --> 00:46:25.570
She's like, yeah, they had to take the tumors out and we get home she has these flat boobs and she's so proud of them.

00:46:25.570 --> 00:46:27.405
I should have said that I know no.

00:46:27.405 --> 00:46:32.083
So then at home I'm finding these pamphlets about your breast reduction.

00:46:32.083 --> 00:46:34.675
Yeah, my mom didn't even have a boob job, she just wanted smaller boobs.

00:46:34.675 --> 00:46:35.840
Yeah, but didn't want me to know.

00:46:35.840 --> 00:46:39.681
She was getting cosmetic surgery, so told me she had tumors, which I was worried she was gonna die.

00:46:39.681 --> 00:46:40.885
Yeah, go ahead.

00:46:40.885 --> 00:46:41.286
So anyways.

00:46:41.286 --> 00:46:41.746
So anyway.

00:46:41.786 --> 00:46:49.630
so I get this surgery and my kids are like oh my god, I look like edward, scissorhands like or sally from everywhere my mom had that too.

00:46:49.630 --> 00:46:51.054
I have tubes coming out of me.

00:46:51.054 --> 00:46:53.528
I'm like like the walking dead right.

00:46:53.528 --> 00:46:55.527
And so Ken's like, oh my God.

00:46:55.527 --> 00:47:00.422
So then she's so worried she's going to get big boobs, like after as she gets older.

00:47:00.422 --> 00:47:02.443
So she was younger, yeah it was a few years ago.

00:47:02.463 --> 00:47:05.927
Because they think it's what we have, right?

00:47:05.927 --> 00:47:11.753
So she'd like make comments to me every once in a while Like, oh, I hope I don't get the big boob gene, I'm going to get that surgery, like you got.

00:47:11.753 --> 00:47:37.039
And I'd be like, yeah, so it is for dinner, we're having tacos, like I'd always try to change the subject, no-transcript.

00:47:37.039 --> 00:47:39.186
And I'm like I didn't have big boobs.

00:47:39.186 --> 00:47:56.163
I go well, at first I said you're not gonna have big boobs, honey, I can tell right now.

00:47:56.163 --> 00:47:56.945
And she's like what?

00:47:56.945 --> 00:48:01.943
And I'm like I had a, I had implants and she could not believe it.

00:48:01.943 --> 00:48:03.126
She was like what?

00:48:03.126 --> 00:48:08.726
And I was like she's been stressing yeah, she's like wait, so I'm not gonna have huge boobs.

00:48:08.726 --> 00:48:10.735
And she's like wait, why'd you get him?

00:48:10.735 --> 00:48:14.005
So then it like started this whole conversation, but a good conversation, yeah.

00:48:14.005 --> 00:48:15.740
So she's like so wait, and I go.

00:48:15.760 --> 00:48:17.188
It was back in the day everyone got him.

00:48:17.188 --> 00:48:18.032
It was totally different.

00:48:18.032 --> 00:48:21.425
So then she's asking me everyone going down the list, so crystal has a boob job?

00:48:21.425 --> 00:48:21.664
Yep.

00:48:21.664 --> 00:48:23.630
So so-and-so has a boob job yep.

00:48:23.630 --> 00:48:27.465
And it was like crazy how many people she named that had a boob job.

00:48:27.465 --> 00:48:28.987
It was like almost every one of my friends.

00:48:28.987 --> 00:48:29.248
Yeah.

00:48:29.409 --> 00:48:31.351
and then she's like none of our friends have a boob job.

00:48:31.351 --> 00:48:39.586
What, oh, maybe some of yours, I don't know hardly anyone besides you, oh, like go ahead, so anyways.

00:48:39.947 --> 00:48:42.152
So she got to one and I was like no, not her.

00:48:42.152 --> 00:48:43.663
And she goes yeah, she's real natural.

00:48:43.663 --> 00:48:49.708
And I was like totally like a natural person, but it was just funny because so many people had him and I was like that's crazy.

00:48:49.708 --> 00:48:52.539
And then we sparked a whole honest conversation.

00:48:52.780 --> 00:48:55.789
But after that you still think you should lie, because look at what a great conversation you had.

00:48:55.949 --> 00:48:56.110
Right.

00:48:56.110 --> 00:49:03.632
Well, we had such a good conversation at a mature age I don't think if, like from fifth grade, her knowing I had a boob job, I don't know.

00:49:03.632 --> 00:49:16.690
And then she even said I'm never going to get that because I don't want to, like have to do yes, yeah, but it's hard because I still believe in the lying, because your kids are going to do what you're you do, yeah, cause they look up to you.

00:49:17.032 --> 00:49:21.097
I agree, but like my mom always lied that she waited until she was married to have sex.

00:49:21.097 --> 00:49:24.543
And then now I'm like you didn't do that but and I think that was great, I don't know.

00:49:24.543 --> 00:49:29.050
I think there's some truth in those moments of this, true stories that I think you lose.

00:49:29.050 --> 00:49:30.293
My mom didn't talk to me about.

00:49:30.293 --> 00:49:36.923
I didn't really do a lot of things wrong, but I I didn't really do everything right either in certain ways, and I wish I could have.

00:49:36.923 --> 00:49:38.693
I guess we could talk about like sex and dating.

00:49:38.693 --> 00:49:42.943
I wish I could have talked to my mom more about that, but she was so lying, like even last night.

00:49:42.943 --> 00:49:45.467
I love talking to my mom about sex, even at this age.

00:49:45.467 --> 00:49:54.018
She, you were on the phone and we were in the car and she's telling me her my dad, my dad, was 86 and could barely stand up and she's telling me they were still doing it.

00:49:54.018 --> 00:49:54.739
I don't know how that.

00:49:54.739 --> 00:49:58.592
Like you saw him, it was like he could barely breathe.

00:49:58.751 --> 00:50:10.586
I don't know how he was getting it up and how they were still doing it and they did it a lot like, yeah, but I love it as an adult like, and someone that's married, knowing my parents, but they had the best marriage and I think that that sex was so part of it.

00:50:10.586 --> 00:50:14.572
So I wish like she would just have talked to me about more stuff.

00:50:14.572 --> 00:50:26.820
Like one of our friends tells her kids everything and he's such a good kid, yeah, and he didn't do any of the things, because she's like no, don't make the same mistakes I made, always says like his dad talked to him about.

00:50:27.280 --> 00:50:28.844
I think it's the way you drive the conversation.

00:50:28.844 --> 00:50:31.132
Yeah, I think it, just yeah, I think it.

00:50:31.132 --> 00:50:41.940
I don't know because they're Ben, had friends too that their parents did things and then the kids did it like yeah, smoking pot or whatever are their parents still actively smoking pot and then their kids are smoking.

00:50:41.960 --> 00:50:44.389
Yes, I think that's the difference, like they're living it still.

00:50:44.429 --> 00:50:48.425
Yeah, yeah, I think monkey, see monkey, do mistake monkey see, though, yeah, not.

00:50:48.445 --> 00:50:50.387
Monkey told me a story and I'm story.

00:50:50.807 --> 00:50:53.092
Well see, ben's dad told him like I tried this.

00:50:53.092 --> 00:50:55.434
And then Ben's thing was, oh, you tried it and you're fine.

00:50:55.434 --> 00:50:57.043
So then you know.

00:50:57.222 --> 00:50:59.907
I don't know, so you don't want to tell him about anal.

00:51:01.492 --> 00:51:02.634
I agree, I don't know.

00:51:02.634 --> 00:51:07.346
I just I feel like maybe lie until they're at the right age you can have good conversation.

00:51:07.365 --> 00:51:08.387
Yeah, cause I.

00:51:08.387 --> 00:51:08.706
It's funny.

00:51:08.706 --> 00:51:11.090
I tell my cheerleaders the truth, cause they're not my kids.

00:51:11.090 --> 00:51:16.199
Yeah, and I tell them all the lessons I learned and this and that, but now Maddie's a cheerleader and I'm like oh they're going to tell her yeah.

00:51:16.219 --> 00:51:17.545
They're telling her things and I'm like crap.

00:51:17.545 --> 00:51:25.826
And so I'm kind of more honest, cause we do get to have like good conversations.

00:51:25.826 --> 00:51:27.487
But I don think that you waited for Kyle.

00:51:27.487 --> 00:51:30.572
We didn't, they didn't have an asset, and I appreciate you saying that on the podcast.

00:51:30.572 --> 00:51:31.673
I think she can listen to it.

00:51:31.673 --> 00:51:32.614
We'll edit that out.

00:51:32.614 --> 00:51:33.335
Um, no, it's fine.

00:51:33.335 --> 00:51:34.724
I again, I don't want to be.

00:51:34.724 --> 00:51:36.956
I want to be, let's be honest like Kristen Cavallari.

00:51:36.956 --> 00:51:38.501
I don't want to be a liar like you do.

00:51:38.521 --> 00:51:41.163
I'm going to have a new podcast by myself called let's be liars.

00:51:41.583 --> 00:51:44.184
It's fine with that.

00:51:44.184 --> 00:51:45.425
I think this is a good stopping point.

00:51:45.425 --> 00:51:47.467
Maybe you can message us.

00:51:47.467 --> 00:51:50.769
Do you lie to your kids about what you've done in the past, especially when you have a past like Tisha's?

00:51:50.769 --> 00:51:51.329
Who knows?

00:51:51.329 --> 00:51:53.711
Oh my God, yeah, let us know.

00:51:53.711 --> 00:51:58.034
All right, moving on Lesson to be learned Make sure he pays for you.

00:51:58.034 --> 00:52:00.197
On the dates yeah, make sure he works for you.

00:52:00.197 --> 00:52:01.458
And it's just a whole.

00:52:01.458 --> 00:52:11.135
Ladies, it's great and it's real.