S3 E15: Mommy’s Little Cocktail: Wine, Xanax & a Side of Poop

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Welcome to Jerking Around, a podcast that makes you feel better about yourself, because we're a mess just like you, and Crystal makes fun of me the whole time and it's great and it's real.

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Welcome to Jerking Around, welcome, welcome, welcome.

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Tisha's acting right today.

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I know a lot of you have been concerned with the stabler going out there If she's safe at home and she is yeah, we have a safe word.

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You know, do you really?

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It's crystal.

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Oh my gosh.

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No safe words, we're not like that, speaking of, most of my passwords are Tisha22, and that gets awkward.

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I know when you had to tell Kyle, especially when I had to tell Kyle he's like not Kyle, I'm like no.

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Our whole work team thinks it's weird.

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I've never had a safe word you might think it's like a jungle at my house, but I've never had a safe word.

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Yeah, we's it.

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I think there's more, but you don't want to talk in front of the listeners.

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Yeah, all right, why don't you share yours first?

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No, I don't really have anything.

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Yeah, college Moving on, okay, okay.

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So I'm a little under the weather today.

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Tisha doesn't really care, she's yet to ask me how I'm feeling.

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Yeah, um, well Tyler was taking such good care of you.

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I feel like you were in good hands.

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You know Speaking of Tyler, our pod daddy Elderberry.

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If you're getting sick, I swear by this, Take some Elderberry and you feel better.

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Didn't I give it to you when you were sick the other day?

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Yeah, Did it help you.

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I don't think I was sick.

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Ben was sick, remember.

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Did it help him Give it to Ben?

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I'm not sure it helps everybody.

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I don't think so, because he had to get a Z-Pak for a sinus infection.

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It didn't help him.

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It was probably too late, though.

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Yeah, I think I'm going to feel better now because of it.

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Yeah, let's talk about things in the.

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I know the plane flipped.

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I feel like I conquered all my flying fears.

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No, I mean not.

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What are you?

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talking about.

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I have videos of you looking out the window last week, right Like two weeks ago, but I used to have to take like a Xanax or something.

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Yeah, a sedative and wine.

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Did you tell that story on here?

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No, I should tell that, oh my gosh.

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And so stop right here, tell the story.

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Tisha was awful, awfully scared to fly years ago.

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We didn't fly as much then.

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We as in.

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We're not married, but yeah, so we were in San Diego for Ben Tahoe.

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No, it was San Diego, ben, are you talking about the diaper?

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Yeah, yeah, and the when the lady was like are you safe?

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Yeah, the lady still will like, text me randomly.

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It's been like 10 years, tell us.

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No, we were in San.

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Okay, so we're in san diego.

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We flew there for something.

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I think ben had a work conference or something and we took the kids and so we are about to fly home and it's the night before the flight.

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This is when it started and I'm looking at the weather and it's storming and I'm like, oh my gosh, I can't fly home in this I have a bad feeling.

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I have a bad feeling and now bear says it.

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He's like I have a bad feeling and now Bear says it.

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He's like I have a bad feeling.

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God doesn't want me to go on that trip.

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I'm all no, god does.

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But now I know how crazy it sounds.

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So I'm telling Ben.

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I'm like, hey, I can't tell this part of the story.

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It's so bad.

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Yeah, you have to Tell the whole story.

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Oh, it's so inappropriate.

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So, anyways, I'm like Ben, I cannot fly tomorrow and I'm like trying to barter with him.

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You know when I am wanting my way I offer things.

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So you promised the biggest no-no there is.

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I promised the biggest no-no, the biggest Never follow through, never going to do this.

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But you went to.

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I was like, if we can rent a car and drive home because we're only six hours away If we can rent a car and drive home tomorrow, you can do this.

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And he was like really, and so he's like running down to the hotel is he really?

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Oh, yeah, he went down to the hotel, like lobby, and was like buying Vaseline, like he was.

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He was like it was like gonna be his moment, you know.

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And then um, and so he was like for real, yeah, he like took bear with him.

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He's like, he's like in the in, like the you know, like the store, at the hotel, like you know, and he's all by and loose.

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Oh, he's a baby.

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Yeah, bear was a baby.

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And so he comes back and he's like you know, like, yeah, we're renting a car.

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And then I was like I was like we, you didn't follow through.

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Yes, good, I'm glad he put his foot down.

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He lost his money, yeah since then he has like loosened up a bit.

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This was earlier on in our marriage where I feel like he like was more the boss he was more the boss earlier on what happened.

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I warmed down, so anyways.

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So we go the next morning and we go to get on our flight and I have two babies Like I have a.

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I had I think CJ was five, ken was three and Bear was one.

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So we had little kids.

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Did you sleep all night?

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Probably not.

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No, so I was sick and so I was so worked up.

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So Ben's assistant at the time, who I love, she was like here.

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She hates flying too.

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She's like here, I have a Xanax, take the Xanax, drink a glass of wine and you'll be fine.

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So I'm like, okay, it's an hour flight, yes, so we get to the airport, but it's like stormy.

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So we get to the airport and so I'm, I take the Xanax and I'm like okay, ben, you go to the gate with the kids, I'm gonna go drink a glass of wine.

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So I get a glass of wine, I drink the glass of wine.

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So did you chug it?

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Yeah, so we come back and it like you know, when it doesn't affect you yet, yeah, and so it didn't affect me yet.

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And I was like, um, oh, wait, first backtrack before I get the glass of wine and the stuff.

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We're like checking in and we're like in the security line and doing all that and I'm like crying because we're flying home and I'm like and so Ben is annoyed with me because he's got all the kids and he's like, gosh, you're so dramatic.

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So he wasn't being like super nice, which he is so nice, so it's kind of funny that he was being kind of like annoyed.

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So this lady sees me and she's like thinks I'm in trouble.

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She's like thinks I'm like an abuse because you're holding these babies, yeah, and I'm crying and I'm like I'm just so scared, scared, and she's like they're there.

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So she's like, hey, let's exchange numbers, like I think she thought I was like so you're in the security line?

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and she asked for your number.

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We exchanged numbers.

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I think she Was Ben wondering what's happening.

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Yeah, he's just done with me.

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At this point.

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He's like you're a whack job, so I'm like crying, I'm.

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She's like are you safe, like is everything okay and like she's thinking he's abusive.

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You know it was like really weird.

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So we get through security, I take the Xanax and then I go get a glass of wine and it does nothing and like, if you've ever taken one which I've only have a few times, like it takes a minute to kick in, yeah, why don't you take it earlier?

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I like worked up, so we get there and so we're sitting.

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So I, I drink my glass of wine, I go meet him back at the gate with the kids and I'm like still stressed out, and then the flight's delayed because of the storm and I'm like, oh my god, you know it's delayed, like it's not safe.

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Yeah, he's like, oh my god, I'm like I'm gonna go get another glass of wine.

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So I go back to the bar, I get another glass of wine and chug it.

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So like, first of all of all, I do not drink very much, so I'm such a lightweight.

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So for one Xanax and two glasses of wine, I am like I.

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So then I come back and then it finally like hits me as we're so that now the plane's boarding and then it finally hits me and I'm so immediately did tell this story.

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No, just keep going.

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Now I'm on the edge of my seat.

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I was was like, yeah, we did, I think on the first podcast.

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All right, just keep going Anyways.

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So I'm like, oh my gosh, I'm so like wasted.

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So I'm like get on the plane.

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And then I'm like you know when you like get on, the flight attendants are greeting you and I'm all let's get a crash.

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And they're like, oh, she's scared, like I'm a kid, and so like the pilot's like sit down here.

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So I sat in the pilot seat.

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He's like showing me the instruments.

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Where are the kids oh, ben took him back to board.

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He's like this whack.

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He was like mortified to be seen with me and now I'm like drunk and so he's like give you the wings.

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I think they did give me the wings.

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They're like here you go, you know, and I'm all you know like, and so I sit down and and they're showing me like this shows us where the lightning is, that we, the turbulence, we can fly around it.

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And they're showing me all the parts and they're like the planes may made to withstand.

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Because I'm like the lightning, because it's like lightning and it's like a full thunderstorm.

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I'm like the lightning, because it's like lightning and it's like a full thunderstorm.

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I'm like why are we taking off?

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So, anyways, so the pilot is like here you want to say hi on the speaker.

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I'm all my kids are back there, and then I'm all hi, like I'm the thing, like so wasted, and so they're like oh, no, so buddy hears me on the speaker.

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He's like God, dumbass, you know.

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And I've still got the lady.

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That's like are you safe?

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It's like what's happening?

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You were really on the speaker.

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Yeah, I was like hey, and I was like drunk too.

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So I'm like hey, hi, kids, you know.

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So I like then I go back to my seat and I like walk back.

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I'm so drunk.

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So I get back and I'm like sitting there and then we like go out to the runway and then we're on the tarmac and then it's delayed again because of the storm.

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So they're like sorry guys, we're delayed, we're gonna have to stay here for a few minutes.

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So now, because I've chugged the wine, I have to pee so bad.

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And you can't get up and pee when you're on the tarmac, tarmac, whatever.

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And so I'm like, oh my god, I have to pee so bad.

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So I'm like what is Ben's?

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Oh, he's so done with me at this point.

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He's like first of all, I didn't get the do it in the butt last night.

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You know.

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He's like I know this bitch.

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You know he's so done with me.

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He's just like you're a whack.

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So I'm like I gotta pee so bad.

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He's like yeah, you gotta hold it.

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I'm like, no, no, like I gotta go.

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He's like, yeah, no, you gotta hold it.

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I'm like, no, I'm gonna, I'm gonna pee my pants.

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And he's like you seriously can't hold your pee.

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And it's like it's not normal pee, it's the alcohol pee.

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It's like it's so strong you have to go, you have to release it.

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It's like it's not normal pee that creeps up.

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You have hours, no, so I'm sitting there and I'm again, so, so.

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So I'm like my youngest was.

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So I'm like, oh, I'll just pee in a diaper, cause, like it's perfect.

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You know, in my mind it was logical.

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So I'm like I'm like Ben, give me a diaper.

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He's like no, I'm like, give me a diaper.

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He's like you're out of control.

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And I'm like give me a diaper.

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He's like you safe.

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Like is he hitting her?

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Like he probably wanted to hit me now.

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So I'm like give me the, give me the diaper.

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He's like he's like you're disgusting, he throws at me.

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He's like I can't even be serious.

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So I'm like wiggling my pants down, you know like, because I like can't get up.

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And so then I just like sat on the diaper and I just like did it hold?

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Yes, it held.

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And I just like, peed in the diaper, yes, it held.

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So you're sitting in the seat with your pants down, yes, but like you know how, like leggings, you can just pull like the back down, but then the front's still kind of here.

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And I think I put like a bag or something over me and then I just like I was, all you know, like released.

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So what'd you do after?

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So I peed in the diaper.

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So then I just, you know, you like wrap it up into the little like triangle, you know.

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I'm like, oh, there it is, you know.

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And then the like fly tongue comes out.

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I'm like, oh, the baby you know, no, but so I peed in a diaper.

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But then the plane took off and I was all like just so drunk, and then we get, we land.

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It's not that long, still drunk when you landed probably.

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I don't remember that part, but I landed I was all.

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That wasn't that bad, and he was like actually it was really bad.

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But he's like, yeah, you know, and he's like, was it a bad fight?

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He said it was.

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I don't remember.

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Oh, that's so but, that's so my point of the flying now is I have since I don't need to take anything to fly anymore, I do my lord's prayer and I'm good.

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I look out the window, you know, yeah, but now I feel like we going to have some regression with all the things in the news.

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Like we got, I have to fly to Texas and Florida and I'm a little for cheer and I'm like I'm going to need to get some.

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I'm going to be calling my friend that is a doctor.

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Hey, you know.

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Oh, I can't wait to fly with you.

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That story is so funny.

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Yeah, cause I want to be so out of it that like we're going down and I'm just like like I was on that flight.

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You know, yeah, yeah, and I am trying to talk you into driving to Dallas, but you won't.

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I'm not driving.

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I'll offer the same thing I offered Ben no no no one wants that no.

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I am flying to Dallas.

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Yeah, yeah, I agree, I don't mind if you go that way, I just don't want to be like going down.

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Yeah, Well, now I thought we were safe once we hit the.

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That's kind of like where I I'm like, okay, we're safe, but now with the flipping over, I'm like we're not even safe.

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Yeah, and I'd still rather flip over on there than Nosedive.

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The nosedive is what I'm scared of.

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The nosedive is what I'm scared of the nose dive is what I'm scared of.

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Yeah, I was on a flight.

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I think sometimes it's more scared of the feeling of being scared.

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I'm not as scared of dying as I'm scared of that feeling.

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Yeah, I'm not scared of dying, I'm scared of nose diving and feeling that like dropping, yeah, like it's happening, here we go.

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This is the end, yeah.

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I had to fly after that and I was so scared I fly out tonight, so it was nice knowing everybody.

00:13:11.125 --> 00:13:11.625
Good luck, yeah, yeah, okay.

00:13:11.625 --> 00:13:13.350
So moving on with the flight story yeah, I forgot.

00:13:13.350 --> 00:13:16.683
I think we have told that story, but oh, I don't think it was as funny as right now.

00:13:17.225 --> 00:13:21.581
Hi guys, yeah, I'm all right and the kids are like they were little.

00:13:21.581 --> 00:13:22.144
They didn't know.

00:13:22.144 --> 00:13:23.346
Like now my are older.

00:13:23.386 --> 00:13:24.971
They would have been so mad at you.

00:13:26.580 --> 00:13:28.118
Well, they'd be like mom's acting weird, like mom's drunk, you know.

00:13:28.118 --> 00:13:29.182
Yeah, even my like.

00:13:29.182 --> 00:13:31.769
If I was going to the bar to get a drink, my daughter would be like what are you doing?

00:13:31.769 --> 00:13:32.291
You know?

00:13:32.331 --> 00:13:32.532
Yeah.

00:13:32.532 --> 00:13:52.855
They wouldn't be like this is normal If you were acting like that Kennedy.

00:13:52.855 --> 00:13:53.076
What's happening in the news?

00:13:53.076 --> 00:13:53.734
But I'm bringing it back, so not much besides the planes.

00:13:53.626 --> 00:13:55.277
I've been off Instagram we had a cheer competition this week and Instagram is where I get my news and um, yeah, I didn't see anything because I had no service.

00:13:55.168 --> 00:13:55.910
Yeah, but how was summer house?

00:13:55.910 --> 00:13:56.248
Oh, this weekend was amazing.

00:13:56.248 --> 00:13:57.871
Yeah, we had nationals for cheer.

00:13:57.871 --> 00:13:58.653
It was amazing.

00:13:58.653 --> 00:14:06.365
I did get sick, but, um, a lot of really cool things happened there like we did really well and it was really cool.

00:14:06.365 --> 00:14:10.429
We had a lot of really cool things happened there Like we did really well and it was really cool.

00:14:10.451 --> 00:14:11.291
We had a lot of good moments as a team.

00:14:11.291 --> 00:14:11.591
It was cool.

00:14:11.591 --> 00:14:13.313
You should tell the story about the praying and the score.

00:14:13.313 --> 00:14:17.238
I know I'm not there yet, really, yeah, I was ready to talk celebrities, let's come back to that, all right.

00:14:17.298 --> 00:14:18.900
All right, I want to talk about Paige and Craig.

00:14:18.900 --> 00:14:20.121
They're my favorite, I know I.

00:14:20.121 --> 00:14:22.604
There's nothing more, though yeah, there is.

00:14:22.604 --> 00:14:24.346
Craig had some more interviews, oh, he did.

00:14:24.346 --> 00:14:25.687
Yeah, and Summer House came out.

00:14:25.687 --> 00:14:32.732
Summer House came out last week and you can tell that, paige, it's like funny seeing a relationship now.

00:14:32.732 --> 00:14:35.696
You can tell they're not doing as good as like the seasons before.

00:14:35.696 --> 00:14:41.903
But at the end of the Summer House Do you think they edited it though to change it?

00:14:41.903 --> 00:14:43.284
No, well, they picked up cameras again.

00:14:43.284 --> 00:14:43.846
You know the pickup.

00:14:43.846 --> 00:14:48.732
Yeah, so at the end of last week's episode they showed picking up the cameras.

00:14:48.732 --> 00:14:55.613
Six months later and Paige is talking bad about Craig and saying that he was texting some witches.

00:14:55.613 --> 00:14:58.990
You know she caught him texting another girl twice or whatever.

00:14:58.990 --> 00:15:05.311
But I think it's just all PR to try to make him look bad, right, and then you know, but it's like picked up cameras.

00:15:05.311 --> 00:15:06.254
I love when they pick up the cameras.

00:15:06.275 --> 00:15:07.279
I love when they pick up the cameras.

00:15:07.279 --> 00:15:09.596
Yeah, like let's pick them up, because I hate when they don't follow it.

00:15:09.596 --> 00:15:09.879
Yeah.

00:15:09.879 --> 00:15:12.746
I remember with Vanderpump, when that happened with Ariana and Tom.

00:15:12.767 --> 00:15:13.570
Yeah, they picked it up.

00:15:13.570 --> 00:15:15.413
I love that they picked it up.

00:15:15.413 --> 00:15:29.232
Oh, it was so great Kyle and preview for next week, but his pr company like he's still like speaking so highly of her and she like went for the jugular last week.

00:15:29.232 --> 00:15:33.846
So it's interesting, yeah, but did you see that blake lively and ryan reynolds went to this saturday night live 50th anniversary?

00:15:33.846 --> 00:15:36.293
Yeah, her face looked different.

00:15:36.293 --> 00:15:37.100
Did you guys notice?

00:15:37.100 --> 00:15:39.586
It was so like she's so pretty to me.

00:15:39.586 --> 00:15:40.548
I think she's so pretty.

00:15:40.548 --> 00:15:45.931
Yeah, it was very like, I don't know, like a doll, like maybe some filler in there.

00:15:45.931 --> 00:15:52.748
Tisha and I were talking, though now that I have to look at my face so close, I like want my eyebrows done, I want lip injections.

00:15:52.748 --> 00:15:55.846
I'm not even like that, no, but like it is hard to see yourself.

00:15:55.846 --> 00:16:00.825
So I get how celebrities get the Brandy Glanville, but Brandy Glanville have you seen her?

00:16:01.105 --> 00:16:02.826
Well, she got a parasite in her face.

00:16:02.826 --> 00:16:04.629
She said I know which.

00:16:04.629 --> 00:16:12.216
We were just talking about a parasite cleanse, yeah, but I don't know if it was a parasite or if it was all the stuff she was injecting, or maybe a parasite from all the stuff she was injecting.

00:16:12.255 --> 00:16:12.476
It's bad.

00:16:12.496 --> 00:16:14.604
It's like what I rarely feel like.

00:16:14.604 --> 00:16:17.169
I see someone that has fillers that I'm like.

00:16:17.169 --> 00:16:18.011
Oh, that looks good.

00:16:28.120 --> 00:16:32.436
Well, I think it's that big of a deal and then all of a sudden, your face looks totally different and I think when you're the one doing it, you don't realize it as much like I think people can see it on you more than you can see it on yourself.

00:16:32.436 --> 00:16:39.346
Well, that I feel like that happened with us with the eyelash extensions it's like I had eyelash extensions, then it's like you have them they look good.

00:16:39.427 --> 00:16:40.710
No, no, yours, look normal.

00:16:40.710 --> 00:16:42.875
Mine was like caterpillars on our eyes.

00:16:42.875 --> 00:16:44.037
We like kept going.

00:16:44.197 --> 00:16:45.200
It was like it was never enough.

00:16:45.200 --> 00:16:46.903
I said I wanted to look like a hooker, yeah.

00:16:47.063 --> 00:16:50.009
I know that's not a yeah, no, that's yeah.

00:16:50.028 --> 00:16:50.650
Why did I say that?

00:16:50.650 --> 00:16:52.413
And Kyle hated him oh, ben did too.

00:16:52.413 --> 00:17:01.548
When, like COVID happened and I couldn't get him, he was like you look beautiful and I was all cause they were like but no, it was like caterpillars.

00:17:01.548 --> 00:17:04.671
But remember, we started with just normal and then you kind of like we went too far.

00:17:04.990 --> 00:17:06.071
I can really open my eyes.

00:17:06.071 --> 00:17:07.374
Yeah, it was so heavy.

00:17:07.374 --> 00:17:08.294
It was so heavy.

00:17:08.294 --> 00:17:10.076
Yeah, I see how that happens, I do.

00:17:10.497 --> 00:17:10.916
And I do.

00:17:10.916 --> 00:17:20.143
I completely relate to, like the people on the on the reality shows when they see themselves and then they're getting all the stuff because oh.

00:17:20.163 --> 00:17:24.146
I want to get all I keep drying my lips on bigger on my lip liner for today.

00:17:24.666 --> 00:17:25.667
And then today I didn't feel good.

00:17:25.667 --> 00:17:28.250
So I'm like you know what, the more I try to make it better, the more it's worse.

00:17:28.250 --> 00:17:32.394
Like my blush it looks like a little kid blind put it on and is blush in.

00:17:32.394 --> 00:17:32.993
I don't know.

00:17:32.993 --> 00:17:39.241
I'm trying to do like, I'm just trying to show some cheekbones are here, yeah, because you can't really see them anymore.

00:17:39.241 --> 00:17:40.784
And I want to bring bronzer here, yeah.

00:17:40.784 --> 00:17:48.895
Like the contour yeah, but it looks like I painted my face and then I like spray tan on, yeah, and then it's like this oh, it's horrible.

00:17:49.656 --> 00:17:58.442
you know, I care just enough, not enough to really go for it, yeah, but it's hard, though it is hard when I see that video of myself come across my feed.

00:17:58.442 --> 00:18:02.380
Like I'll open Instagram and it'll pop up on my feed and I just want to crawl in a hole.

00:18:02.641 --> 00:18:04.489
I'm like I know, oh, I was telling her this weekend.

00:18:04.489 --> 00:18:10.109
I don't think anybody really likes to see themselves, though, or hear their voice, my voice especially right now yeah.

00:18:10.109 --> 00:18:12.865
Sounds like a man kind of in a good way, though I like it a little raspy.

00:18:12.865 --> 00:18:15.607
Yeah, like you know, like a smelly cat Phoebe yeah.

00:18:15.607 --> 00:18:19.170
But yeah, I don't think anyone likes seeing themselves.

00:18:19.170 --> 00:18:27.346
I feel like an idiot most times I hate it, we were talking about this this weekend, though A lot of things that you feel like an idiot for are really motivational things.

00:18:27.386 --> 00:18:30.431
I did see another quote about that, maybe because we talked about it.

00:18:30.431 --> 00:18:34.174
Then my phone heard and it was like if you're not feeling stupid, you're not trying.

00:18:34.174 --> 00:18:35.556
Yeah, something new, yeah.

00:18:37.160 --> 00:18:37.942
But I don't try new stuff.

00:18:37.942 --> 00:18:40.170
Well, I was just trying to do this story this weekend.

00:18:40.170 --> 00:18:44.164
This is something so simple, but we were just telling stories about this weekend and I'm going to feel it more now.

00:18:44.164 --> 00:18:55.384
Yeah, so we team for years we won nationals, I think two times together.

00:18:55.384 --> 00:18:56.368
I think I went three together, two with you.

00:18:56.368 --> 00:18:56.932
Did you win twice?

00:18:56.932 --> 00:18:58.297
I think we went twice, yeah, and I won before you got there.

00:18:58.297 --> 00:19:00.001
And then we our last year didn't do as good.

00:19:00.001 --> 00:19:02.828
Yeah, um, and then I coached and we won nationals many times.

00:19:02.828 --> 00:19:06.565
And then our daughter's cheer team both of our daughters.

00:19:06.565 --> 00:19:12.509
It's a very winning, winning cheer program, like all-star program, so we're very used to winning um.

00:19:12.528 --> 00:19:21.631
So when we I started coaching at Liberty, it wasn't as winning culture right, which it is like a culture like in the book change your paradigm, change your life still such a good book.

00:19:21.631 --> 00:19:23.001
I started listening to it again last week.

00:19:23.001 --> 00:19:26.556
I've been doing like when I pray in the mornings.

00:19:26.556 --> 00:19:28.221
I've been like telling myself who I am.

00:19:28.221 --> 00:19:30.949
This sounds really weird, but it really makes a difference.

00:19:30.949 --> 00:19:32.642
So I could tell you it's.

00:19:32.642 --> 00:19:37.503
I don't want to, but I could tell you the things I tell myself every day and they are starting to happen.

00:19:37.503 --> 00:19:38.106
It's crazy.

00:19:38.106 --> 00:19:40.819
It's like I tell I've been telling myself I'm a champion, cheer coach.

00:19:40.819 --> 00:19:43.282
Yeah, like I am, that's who I am Totally Cause.

00:19:43.282 --> 00:19:47.528
When you start to say you're that, then you start making decisions as if you're that.

00:19:47.528 --> 00:19:49.088
I tell myself I'm a healthy person.

00:19:49.088 --> 00:19:52.413
Yeah, not there yet, but I just had some elderberry, some vitamin C.

00:19:53.453 --> 00:19:56.257
And then I tell myself I'm a podcaster that doesn't look stupid on Instagram.

00:19:56.400 --> 00:19:57.363
No, I, that's one of them.

00:19:57.363 --> 00:19:57.784
I run.

00:19:57.784 --> 00:19:59.689
We have a successful podcast.

00:19:59.689 --> 00:20:05.045
That's one of my things, yeah, and then, um, I'm good with money working on that.

00:20:05.165 --> 00:20:06.366
Yeah, and then um.

00:20:06.467 --> 00:20:09.411
I'm a good wife, a good daughter, good niece and a good mom.

00:20:09.411 --> 00:20:13.644
I tell myself that, yeah, and then I tell myself that I bring other people to God.

00:20:13.644 --> 00:20:15.393
Those are like the things I want to be.

00:20:15.393 --> 00:20:18.628
Every day I bring others to God, I motivate and inspire people to be better.

00:20:18.628 --> 00:20:19.976
I'm a I coach a champion team.

00:20:19.976 --> 00:20:22.022
So I tell myself every day all the things I want to be.

00:20:23.025 --> 00:20:26.980
But it's crazy, Like the voice we're going to have to work with it today.

00:20:26.980 --> 00:20:34.795
When you tell yourself and you focus in the mornings especially when I was doing my walks after 75 hard and I get my intentions right for the day, all your decisions after that become that.

00:20:34.795 --> 00:20:43.369
So this weekend with the girls, you know we're starting to teach them how to be champions and it's not always what happens in the three minutes that they compete.

00:20:43.369 --> 00:20:46.990
It's the decisions you make every day that are champion decisions Right.

00:20:46.990 --> 00:20:55.771
Like, for example, one of our last practices we were at at Top Gun, the all-star gym, and the coach who coaches our girls helps our cheer team, which is so cool like that.

00:20:55.771 --> 00:20:59.825
He, he helps us and I get to work with him someone I admire.

00:20:59.845 --> 00:21:07.768
He takes the time, yes, and I admire him like he's one of my all-time favorite people, so getting him to see work with the girls I love so much is so cool.

00:21:07.768 --> 00:21:10.782
And so he's like hard on all of his teams.

00:21:10.782 --> 00:21:12.449
So now I like you can be hard on them.

00:21:12.449 --> 00:21:18.403
They can handle it because they're tough now, right, and so it was like they were going full out, full out, back to back.

00:21:18.403 --> 00:21:24.241
And he doesn't love air conditioning because he's smart with his money, so the girls aren't used to it being so hot in there, yeah.

00:21:24.241 --> 00:21:29.026
And so they're looking at me like and I'm like again, right, drew, you know, yeah, yeah.

00:21:29.026 --> 00:21:30.247
And they're like okay.

00:21:30.247 --> 00:21:31.969
And he's like again yeah, what are you talking about?

00:21:31.969 --> 00:21:32.950
I'm like okay Again.

00:21:32.950 --> 00:21:36.653
Drew said you know, and there was one point where they wanted to be done.

00:21:36.653 --> 00:21:37.634
Even Drew's like what do you want to do?

00:21:37.634 --> 00:21:41.596
And I was like no, every other team would be done right here, but we're better than every other team.

00:21:41.596 --> 00:21:46.766
Let's go again.

00:21:47.226 --> 00:21:52.051
And I think all those small moments when you gave, when you wanted to give up, make you like better.

00:21:52.051 --> 00:21:56.685
So when we were there, when we were about to walk in, I just told the teacher this story.

00:21:56.685 --> 00:21:59.909
I said, okay, put your phones away, get your chest up.

00:21:59.909 --> 00:22:00.161
Like.

00:22:00.161 --> 00:22:04.826
That's something our coach always taught us is like you decide you're a champion as soon as you step up.

00:22:04.826 --> 00:22:07.726
Like put your chest up, like we were watching other teams.

00:22:07.726 --> 00:22:10.508
As soon as they start with their chest up, I'm like they're gonna be good.

00:22:10.508 --> 00:22:13.971
Right, like you can tell as soon as they hit the mat and they set if they're gonna be good or not.

00:22:13.971 --> 00:22:16.012
Right, it's like because you tell people who you are.

00:22:16.012 --> 00:22:21.103
So I was like chest up, get focused in lines, music on and walk like you're a champion.

00:22:22.871 --> 00:22:29.508
And last night we were driving home from the airport, some of the girls told me that was one of their favorite moments, because people were looking at them as though they were champions.

00:22:29.508 --> 00:22:33.075
Right, because we were demanding it, like we were setting the stage.

00:22:33.075 --> 00:22:40.013
And it's like I felt stupid because this team hasn't isn't a culture of champions yet we're building it.

00:22:40.013 --> 00:22:43.530
But I felt stupid telling them to do that, that they were going to think it was dumb, right?

00:22:43.530 --> 00:22:48.289
So it's like so funny All the things you do where you feel stupid, which, lucky me, that happens.

00:22:48.289 --> 00:22:59.022
Like every day I do something that I feel stupid about and then in the car on the way home they're like that was my favorite thing, yeah, but it's like how many things do we miss because we're scared to go on a limb?

00:22:59.022 --> 00:23:02.096
And, like you know, when I play a song for the girls, the first practice I made them lay in a circle and close their eyes and play a song.

00:23:02.096 --> 00:23:09.673
I was like they're gonna think this is so dumb, right, and now we do all that and they're like I love our, our, like circle time and what we do.

00:23:09.673 --> 00:23:10.576
But I felt stupid.

00:23:10.576 --> 00:23:13.382
But it's like everything great comes after you feel stupid.

00:23:13.702 --> 00:23:25.324
I really really think that like nothing I've ever been proud of happened without me going on a limb and people thinking I was crazy, like anyone great people think they're crazy Einstein.

00:23:25.324 --> 00:23:27.930
They thought that he was crazy, but like he didn't listen.

00:23:27.930 --> 00:23:30.243
I think it's when you don't listen, is when you make it.

00:23:30.243 --> 00:23:32.349
When you listen is when you never get there.

00:23:32.349 --> 00:23:34.506
You know, especially any entrepreneur.

00:23:34.506 --> 00:23:43.319
I listen to Dave Ramsey every morning because I am smart with my money, it's one of my things, yeah, and it helps ground me because the world tells you to finance this or do this Right.

00:23:43.319 --> 00:23:52.595
And like every morning, if I start my day off with him, I'm like, okay, I don't need to reload Starbucks five times in a week, that's not smart Right, and I like refocus on what my goals are.

00:23:53.060 --> 00:24:08.327
But he talked about how he started his business at a table and I'm like think about starting that business Like he was an entrepreneur, real estate mogul who lost everything, went into debt like lost all of his houses and then decided I'm going to start a finance company.

00:24:08.327 --> 00:24:09.821
But is it a finance Like what?

00:24:09.821 --> 00:24:10.063
Even?

00:24:10.063 --> 00:24:12.407
Is it Right it start a finance company, but is it a fight like what?

00:24:12.407 --> 00:24:12.508
Even?

00:24:12.508 --> 00:24:12.749
Is it right?

00:24:12.749 --> 00:24:13.849
It's to teach people to pay off debt and it's gonna.

00:24:13.849 --> 00:24:15.131
He has over a thousand employees.

00:24:15.371 --> 00:24:19.815
Yeah, mind-blowing, it's a multi-million dollar he has like separate things now too.

00:24:19.855 --> 00:24:26.392
He has the real estate, the financial advisors, but if I sat down, it's like let's help people, yeah, and start a company teaching them how to pay off debt.

00:24:26.392 --> 00:24:27.821
It would be laughable, right.

00:24:27.821 --> 00:24:30.826
Like no one's gonna pay you to help them pay off debt.

00:24:30.826 --> 00:24:33.771
When you're trying to help them save money, they're going to spend money, right.

00:24:33.771 --> 00:24:34.814
It's crazy, yeah.

00:24:34.814 --> 00:24:38.086
And now look at it, but I'm like that probably sounded so stupid, right.

00:24:38.086 --> 00:24:44.085
And so if you think we're stupid on the podcast, we're not giving up because Tisha was wanting to, but I don't know everything.

00:24:44.144 --> 00:24:45.487
I don't love when I said I was running.

00:24:45.487 --> 00:24:48.530
I don't do a lot of things that make me feel stupid.

00:24:48.530 --> 00:24:50.834
Yeah, I'm not a big risk taker.

00:24:50.834 --> 00:24:51.996
Yeah, I feel like.

00:24:52.036 --> 00:24:53.221
I do all the time.

00:24:53.701 --> 00:24:57.942
I'm like, oh yeah, you're not a big risk taker, I'm not a big risk taker and I'm a big risk taker.

00:24:57.962 --> 00:25:04.365
I would say like when I was in my story I want to run for president, everybody laughed at my face, yeah, and then you doubt yourself, you're like I can't do this.

00:25:04.365 --> 00:25:09.531
But then, like when you've pushed outside of your comfort zone and it's worked, you like rely on that.

00:25:09.531 --> 00:25:10.633
You're like I can do it.

00:25:10.633 --> 00:25:15.047
And if God's telling me to do something, I feel like God's telling us to have this podcast.

00:25:15.047 --> 00:25:17.643
Then I'm like, if he's got my back, screw everybody.

00:25:17.643 --> 00:25:24.664
Yeah, like it's not meant for everyone to understand, right, it's only meant for the few people that hopefully we're helping feel not alone.

00:25:24.664 --> 00:25:27.548
You know, and I do, we do get that feedback For sure.

00:25:27.548 --> 00:25:32.075
Yeah, and that they get more freaky with their husbands yeah, you know, that's a passion of ours.

00:25:32.075 --> 00:25:33.825
Yeah, you got to get doing it.

00:25:33.825 --> 00:25:34.768
Get going, yeah, yeah.

00:25:34.768 --> 00:25:36.307
So, yeah, feel stupid.

00:25:37.435 --> 00:25:38.079
I feel stupid a lot.

00:25:38.079 --> 00:25:40.385
I'm going to do one thing every week that makes me feel stupid.

00:25:40.385 --> 00:25:42.471
Well, you grow in that, I think, when you feel vulnerable.

00:25:42.519 --> 00:25:43.865
Have you ever gone through a breakup or something?

00:25:43.865 --> 00:25:53.468
Then all of a sudden, you're very vulnerable to everyone who's hurting, like have you ever been super upset?

00:25:53.468 --> 00:26:18.220
And you feel like so alone and you like, all of a sudden have a sense of all the people hurting and you're like nicer to people because you remember, like you're in it and you're like, oh yeah, no not really, but oh my gosh, you probably just went through that too but I do feel like I am sensitive to real like, or especially kids that are going through something, Like kids that foster you know, because you have gone through it, yeah, or?

00:26:18.259 --> 00:26:22.090
like kids whose parents are not, you know, like struggling.

00:26:22.090 --> 00:26:26.490
That really is like a trigger for me, because you've been through it and I'm so sensitive to it.

00:26:26.490 --> 00:26:27.353
Yeah, yeah.

00:26:27.353 --> 00:26:34.227
So maybe it's just because I haven't I don't know, I'm not very empathetic maybe I don't know.

00:26:34.227 --> 00:26:39.511
I feel like I am, though, so I don't know I wouldn't say you're empathetic, but not for dumb things, but for real things.

00:26:40.553 --> 00:26:41.733
Yeah, I don't think anything's dumb.

00:26:41.733 --> 00:26:44.076
If someone's upset about it, I don't think it's your place to judge.

00:26:44.076 --> 00:26:48.002
Oh, I'm all totally dumb.

00:26:48.002 --> 00:26:50.487
Like I sound stupid on a podcast and it ruins your day.

00:26:50.788 --> 00:26:54.153
Yeah Well, it doesn't ruin my day, but it makes me not want to do it.

00:26:54.354 --> 00:26:54.954
It affects you.

00:26:54.954 --> 00:26:59.484
Yeah, so I feel like everybody has their things, yeah, that are like important to them.

00:26:59.484 --> 00:27:00.808
Yes, you know.

00:27:00.808 --> 00:27:06.281
Yeah, like your mom passed and it didn't affect you, but my dad affected me.

00:27:06.281 --> 00:27:08.563
Yeah, it doesn't mean it's dumb, yeah, but that's something real.

00:27:08.563 --> 00:27:14.526
Yeah, but like I don't know, I think sometimes we can be easily affected by minor things bigger than the big things.

00:27:14.846 --> 00:27:17.448
Yeah, the big things you're in like fighter mode.

00:27:17.887 --> 00:27:22.349
Yeah, like I get affected by certain things that are weird, and then other things.

00:27:22.349 --> 00:27:24.912
I'm like eh yeah, I don't know Totally.

00:27:24.912 --> 00:27:28.272
Yeah, but I don't think you're very empathetic, as evidenced right now.

00:27:28.272 --> 00:27:30.914
I just think you're a fight or flight.

00:27:30.914 --> 00:27:32.255
You've been through harder things.

00:27:32.255 --> 00:27:33.476
My mom's like that.

00:27:33.476 --> 00:27:37.817
She's been through harder things, so like little things, she just doesn't have the tolerance for it.

00:27:37.817 --> 00:27:41.847
Yeah, anyways, like I was like the whole school's picking on me.

00:27:41.847 --> 00:27:43.992
She's like yeah, yeah, yeah, you're fine.

00:27:48.586 --> 00:27:48.807
I'm all.

00:27:48.807 --> 00:27:50.509
I don't think so so mean.

00:27:50.611 --> 00:27:55.067
And I was like maybe you jerk, and then they'd be like roughen stuff with your Afro puff.

00:27:55.489 --> 00:27:56.874
Oh that's horrible With my mullet.

00:27:56.980 --> 00:28:01.329
Yeah, go on with your bad self, and I'd be all, but it was hard, that was hard.

00:28:16.980 --> 00:28:18.766
But it made you better, jerk, but yeah, anyways, anyways, yeah.

00:28:18.766 --> 00:28:19.749
So this weekend it was super cool.

00:28:19.749 --> 00:28:20.471
We had a lot of god moments.

00:28:20.471 --> 00:28:29.340
Um, you know, I think we push the envelope a little with that stuff sometimes, um, but it's pretty cool to see like the girls start to believe not only in themselves but in, like that there's a purpose in your pain.

00:28:29.340 --> 00:28:32.907
Yeah, right, like so there's a purpose in the hardships we go through as a team.

00:28:32.907 --> 00:28:40.721
Like it's cool to teach kids that, right, we really learned that at a young age that, like you could do anything you set your mind to, and that going through hardships makes you stronger.

00:28:41.183 --> 00:28:43.849
And I think sometimes that's lost in this culture, like totally.

00:28:43.849 --> 00:28:46.262
I think the next generation, like I've always said, is amazing.

00:28:46.262 --> 00:28:50.230
Like these girls are nicer to each other than I've ever seen.

00:28:50.230 --> 00:28:56.148
Like it's crazy how nice they are, how kind, what good decisions they make, like they're good kids.

00:28:56.148 --> 00:28:59.384
But I think sometimes there's like a toughness factor that's missing.

00:28:59.384 --> 00:29:06.902
Like when I came around last year, they I would tell you guys, they called me the gaslighter and I was like no, it's called changing your attitude, right, like it's not gaslighting.

00:29:07.162 --> 00:29:09.305
Like you're fine, well, society it's not.

00:29:09.305 --> 00:29:15.413
It's like all about your feelings, and I feel like when we were in cheer it was like feelings don't matter.

00:29:15.714 --> 00:29:16.576
Yeah, feelings don't matter.

00:29:16.680 --> 00:29:18.259
But it taught you to be strong.

00:29:18.259 --> 00:29:21.869
I feel like to get through hard things, to know you can get through hard things.

00:29:21.869 --> 00:29:26.392
To work, you know, like discipline, all that stuff that's paid off, you know.

00:29:26.392 --> 00:29:28.246
Yeah, Feelings can really lead you astray.

00:29:32.299 --> 00:29:34.588
Feelings are not facts, exactly yeah, what's the worst thing you've ever done because of your feelings?

00:29:34.588 --> 00:29:35.551
The trench coat, no.

00:29:36.214 --> 00:29:38.584
I know I'm all every boyfriend before Ben no.

00:29:38.584 --> 00:29:42.298
But you know, feelings are just like used to say like yeah, the you.

00:29:42.298 --> 00:29:43.986
I could feel like there's a monster in the closet.

00:29:43.986 --> 00:29:45.131
There's not, yeah.

00:29:45.131 --> 00:29:51.105
So I think feelings can be very deceiving because, especially in the culture, that's like follow your heart, do this.

00:29:51.105 --> 00:29:55.452
It's almost like do the opposite of your feelings because your feelings aren't from God.

00:29:55.452 --> 00:29:56.934
It's like I know.00:29:57.321 --> 00:29:58.473


That's really hard to decipher.00:29:58.473 --> 00:29:58.980


Yeah, it is.00:29:58.980 --> 00:30:00.867


That's how I feel with some of my old boyfriends.00:30:00.867 --> 00:30:04.827


You know we've told a lot of stories on here but I still, like don't regret any of them.00:30:04.827 --> 00:30:15.250


Like I feel like it was meant to be, you know, like you know, like you love people for a reason right, and like the people that are in your life is for a reason.00:30:15.269 --> 00:30:19.144


But sometimes I like to bring, or there's some people in like unhealthy things that they feel that they love this person.00:30:19.144 --> 00:30:20.287


I'm like you should get out.00:30:20.287 --> 00:30:21.530


It's not healthy, you know.00:30:21.530 --> 00:30:23.505


Yeah, like abusive or whatever.00:30:23.505 --> 00:30:23.885


You know.00:30:24.247 --> 00:30:28.076


Yeah, I don't know it's weird, I don't know.00:30:28.076 --> 00:30:30.523


Have you ever been in an abusive relationship?00:30:30.523 --> 00:30:31.307


No really.00:30:31.307 --> 00:30:33.752


Have you ever abused someone in a relationship?00:30:33.752 --> 00:30:35.057


No, a little bit.00:30:35.099 --> 00:30:42.001


I mean Ben might say I'm abused, but no, my kids are.00:30:42.001 --> 00:30:42.884


Like I'm abused.00:30:42.884 --> 00:30:46.000


No, they are not, we're just kidding, kind of no, like.00:30:46.000 --> 00:30:56.215


I've been seeing those things on like Instagram though, like if your dad never screamed to you during math, like, or if you're I sent it to Jen the other day if your brother never chased you around with a knife and it shows.00:30:56.215 --> 00:30:58.424


And I was like oh, that's so funny.00:30:58.424 --> 00:30:59.507


Did you chase him with a knife?00:30:59.507 --> 00:31:02.981


No, but Jen's brother did, and in high school, and I remember were you there?00:31:03.122 --> 00:31:07.467


Yes, we were in the kitchen and he was chasing her with a knife and we were like scared.00:31:07.467 --> 00:31:15.895


But it was like so funny and I sent it to her and I was like, remember when he was chasing you, and it's just funny because like now it's like a meme, like yeah, that that happens.00:31:15.895 --> 00:31:20.198


And it's like, yeah, like it, you've never been chased by your sibling with a knife, and it shows.00:31:20.198 --> 00:31:21.363


But it was just so funny because.00:31:21.363 --> 00:31:26.403


And then someone was like, yeah, your kids will be like you've never been thrown in the pool in the middle of winter, you know, and it shows.00:31:26.423 --> 00:31:26.884


I'm like, yeah, they will.00:31:26.884 --> 00:31:27.787


You haven't been thrown anybody anymore.00:31:27.787 --> 00:31:29.932


I know I feel like, yeah, they will, you haven't been throwing anybody anymore.00:31:29.932 --> 00:31:31.817


I know I feel like you've turned a corner with that.00:31:31.836 --> 00:31:32.900


Maybe they've been acting better, I don't know.00:31:33.319 --> 00:31:35.064


I feel like your kids have been acting better, right?00:31:35.064 --> 00:31:37.388


Yeah, I guess no.00:31:37.670 --> 00:31:38.913


Yeah, I don't know.00:31:46.945 --> 00:31:48.527


Yeah, I've been taking the phone away a lot.00:31:48.527 --> 00:31:51.828


I guess now that when you have the phone, you you talking about the teenage nasty.00:31:51.929 --> 00:31:54.431


the teenage nasty, that's what it should be called the eighth grade Right.00:31:54.570 --> 00:31:57.032


Yeah, and I was talking to some of the cheerleaders about it.00:31:57.032 --> 00:31:59.694


It's cool because I like I'm not their mom, right, so I don't.00:31:59.694 --> 00:32:02.837


They never give us attitude they know better, right, like it wouldn't flow.00:32:07.643 --> 00:32:08.223


Yeah.00:32:08.364 --> 00:32:15.590


Yeah, like, and Maddie won't do it at practice, and we get in the car and I get the nasty, yeah, and it I kind of think it's like normal, yeah.00:32:15.590 --> 00:32:21.259


So I feel like one of my girls was telling me she got in big trouble cause she was grouchy in the morning and disrespected the mom.00:32:21.259 --> 00:32:25.605


I think what happens is like we're sensitive because we want their attention.00:32:25.605 --> 00:32:31.053


Now it's like it's flipping, like you and Ben flipped, you know, like he used to be mean and now you're the nasty.00:32:31.053 --> 00:32:40.631


Um, but I think it does like flip, like all of a sudden they want your attention and then all of a sudden you want their attention, right, and so I think we're more sensitive, like, do they still like us?00:32:40.631 --> 00:32:41.200


Do?00:32:41.220 --> 00:32:43.782


they want to talk to us, you're like, hey, yeah, trying to talk to them.00:32:43.803 --> 00:32:48.509


And then, when they're like no, you're like God, you're nasty, yeah, but really it's not that big of a deal.00:32:48.509 --> 00:32:57.109


Yeah, so there's a fine line between allowing it and then also like not taking it personal Totally, because my mom would let me do it, because she knew I was just acting stupid.00:32:57.109 --> 00:32:59.261


But then, at the same time, I don't want to disrespect her.00:32:59.261 --> 00:33:00.182


I still act like that.00:33:00.182 --> 00:33:03.065


Yeah, it's hard, I feel bad for her.00:33:03.065 --> 00:33:03.846


It's hard watching.00:33:03.846 --> 00:33:11.211


I don't know if anyone's dealt with when you like, um, the relationship changes.00:33:11.211 --> 00:33:12.653


Yeah, it's like more of a.00:33:12.653 --> 00:33:16.215


You're the parent, you know I don't know what to do for her either.00:33:16.215 --> 00:33:25.145


It's super hard Cause my mom raised me like you, not very empathetic.00:33:25.145 --> 00:33:32.001


So if I called her crying, it was like okay, and so like now I'm doing that to her and I feel bad, but I'm like I know he passed, it's horrible, but like I don't know how to help her.00:33:32.001 --> 00:33:36.511


Yeah, any advice for those of you out there that have lost one parent and have the other one left.00:33:36.511 --> 00:33:37.374


It's super hard.00:33:38.039 --> 00:33:41.931


When my stepmom died, I feel like we took my dad with us on a lot of things.00:33:41.931 --> 00:33:45.902


Like it was more about him not being alone, which your mom is lucky she lives.00:33:45.902 --> 00:33:54.250


Yeah, I'm really coughing Because he was living alone and so we would always be inviting him.00:33:54.250 --> 00:33:57.134


But you do that, so I think that's really all you can do.00:33:57.595 --> 00:34:04.220


Yeah, it's hard, I know no-transcript.00:34:04.566 --> 00:34:04.988


It's hard.00:34:05.209 --> 00:34:07.607


I'm like coughing Do you have something in your throat.00:34:08.429 --> 00:34:11.096


Oh, yeah, Thanks oh wow, she's the best.00:34:11.335 --> 00:34:13.947


Is that your water Waltish?00:34:13.947 --> 00:34:14.750


What else do you want to talk?00:34:14.769 --> 00:34:15.030


about today.00:34:15.030 --> 00:34:16.228


You always have something in your throat.00:34:16.469 --> 00:34:17.052


No, I don't.00:34:17.052 --> 00:34:18.291


I haven't been acting nasty.00:34:18.291 --> 00:34:19.630


How was your Valentine's Day?00:34:19.630 --> 00:34:21.291


Did you and Ben do anything special?00:34:21.291 --> 00:34:22.173


We went to the casino.00:34:33.125 --> 00:34:34.088


Look at the gambler now I know how was it.00:34:34.088 --> 00:34:34.829


It was okay, it was mid, so he won.00:34:34.829 --> 00:34:37.398


We sat down, I texted you, he won like a few hundred dollars within like 10 minutes.00:34:37.398 --> 00:34:45.686


But then we had invited some other friends to join us because you were out of town, you know who, dave and Kara, and so, um, but they had a game, their son's game, so they had to come later.00:34:45.686 --> 00:34:55.000


So then we were waiting for them, so then we should have left, but then we had to wait and then gave it all back and then some.00:34:55.000 --> 00:34:56.186


But you know what?00:34:56.186 --> 00:35:04.594


It's kind of like anything in life, my threshold, so like I used to be such an anti gambler that like if I lost a hundred dollars I would be sick.00:35:04.594 --> 00:35:06.579


I would be like, oh my God.00:35:06.639 --> 00:35:07.380


I can't believe it.00:35:07.581 --> 00:35:08.663


And now it's like oh no.00:35:08.663 --> 00:35:12.313


I lost $300 that night and I was like Kara, hey, do you have $100?00:35:12.313 --> 00:35:12.894


I'll Venmo you.00:35:12.894 --> 00:35:14.509


I was like I'm the new Crystal.00:35:14.509 --> 00:35:15.793


This is escalating.00:35:15.793 --> 00:35:17.396


You really did Swear to God.00:35:17.396 --> 00:35:23.469


I was like I am disgusting, you know.00:35:23.469 --> 00:35:27.032


I was like hey, you know, and I didn't want to have to go to him and be like, hey, can I have a?00:35:27.052 --> 00:35:29.134


hundred bucks, he'd be like you lost another hundred.00:35:29.134 --> 00:35:34.157


So she gave me a hundred and then I had to Venmo her but I was like, oh my God, I lost $300.00:35:34.157 --> 00:35:36.239


And like that never would have happened.00:35:36.239 --> 00:35:38.121


You know me, did you find any good machines?00:35:38.121 --> 00:35:40.043


No, yeah, we went to the new one.00:35:48.704 --> 00:35:49.086


Have you been busy?00:35:49.086 --> 00:35:49.427


So I liked that.00:35:49.427 --> 00:35:50.673


But Ben won a little bit at the beginning but then he lost it.00:35:50.673 --> 00:35:51.900


But yeah, no, I know, I don't look at it as a way to make money.00:35:51.900 --> 00:35:52.724


That's how kind of Kyle Kyle looks at it.00:35:52.724 --> 00:35:55.775


I look at it as like if I took $300 to go on a date night.00:35:55.775 --> 00:35:57.740


Right, you got to anticipate that.00:35:57.740 --> 00:35:58.262


That's gone.00:35:58.784 --> 00:36:11.681


well, and this is what I told Ben is like I'm trying not to eat bad and go out to eat so much, because I feel like I've been doing that and I really want to lock it in so like there's not much, there's not much to do and if I go to a movie, I want we went to a patch and popcorn.00:36:11.681 --> 00:36:13.773


I want the icy and the popcorn and the sour patch.00:36:13.773 --> 00:36:15.081


We did that on Saturday.00:36:15.081 --> 00:36:15.643


I ate it all.00:36:15.643 --> 00:36:16.467


I felt horrible.00:36:16.467 --> 00:36:18.313


I'm like it's way better to go to the casino.00:36:18.856 --> 00:36:25.773


I know, not taking the calories like I know, but you still feel like you don't feel good when you leave sometimes.00:36:25.813 --> 00:36:27.255


No, I was like oh, how did I leave?00:36:27.275 --> 00:36:31.534


Like when you're there it's such a high and I don't like do drugs or drink really.00:36:31.534 --> 00:36:40.710


So I don't really get a high off, much yeah, but there it's like ding, ding, ding, ding ding and I'm like yeah, and the money seems so fake it's like oh, another hundred in.00:36:40.710 --> 00:36:45.793


It doesn't feel like crazy.00:36:45.813 --> 00:36:49.880


You could have bought something so nice, or like it's just like a huge like amount.00:36:49.880 --> 00:36:53.596


I'm like that's like groceries for the week you know, yeah, it's crazy.00:36:53.596 --> 00:36:57.235


I was like I'm disgusting, you know, yeah, but I got over it.00:36:57.235 --> 00:36:58.771


I'm already like, oh, when are we going again?00:36:58.771 --> 00:37:03.530


Yeah, should we go after this?00:37:03.530 --> 00:37:04.391


But I'm the new you.00:37:04.391 --> 00:37:05.074


I know.00:37:05.153 --> 00:37:06.615


See, don't judge, that's what I tell people.00:37:06.615 --> 00:37:08.958


Don't judge people, I know, because then it happens to you.00:37:09.559 --> 00:37:11.311


I know I feel like that happened.00:37:11.311 --> 00:37:12.807


Yeah, I'm going to New.00:37:12.847 --> 00:37:13.550


Jersey tonight.00:37:13.550 --> 00:37:14.775


Yeah, oh, do they have.00:37:14.775 --> 00:37:16.913


My brother usually takes me to the casino when we go.00:37:17.045 --> 00:37:18.130


Do they have casinos there?00:37:18.130 --> 00:37:18.672


Atlantic City.00:37:23.030 --> 00:37:23.630


Oh, is that close it's?00:37:23.630 --> 00:37:30.878


I like play on my phone sometimes, like when I'm in an airport or whatever, and it is fake money on there, and it's just as fun in some ways, really, yeah.00:37:30.878 --> 00:37:35.735


So then when it's real money and I get that sick feeling, I'm like I'd rather just play on my phone, play the fake money.00:37:35.735 --> 00:37:39.652


Yeah, because it's like it's not really money, it's like I just want to play on the machine.00:37:39.652 --> 00:37:41.266


Yeah, I don't really want to spend the money.00:37:41.266 --> 00:37:42.268


You just want to play.00:37:42.268 --> 00:37:45.034


Yeah, so it's kind of weird, yeah, yeah.00:37:45.034 --> 00:37:48.079


So I kind of want to tell this story, but I don't.00:37:48.079 --> 00:37:51.067


But I, my brain, isn't there today because I don't feel good.00:37:51.067 --> 00:37:56.012


But Tisha and I did this super cute thing with our kids and we sound like idiots, but it's a cute story.00:37:56.012 --> 00:37:58.159


So we go to Tahoe every summer.00:37:58.260 --> 00:38:01.869


I'm telling it yeah, oh my god, it's something to tell yeah, and we go to Lake Tahoe.00:38:01.909 --> 00:38:03.311


If you guys haven't been, it's amazing.00:38:03.311 --> 00:38:10.545


But stay at the Hyatt, because a lot of people have gone to the other part of Tahoe and it doesn't give us as much of the magical feeling as the Hyatt in Lake Tahoe does.00:38:10.644 --> 00:38:18.731


It's like northeast Tahoe, it's like small town, inclined village, pine trees and a lake.00:38:18.891 --> 00:38:22.471


It's magical and they have a casino there and we've gone for like seven years.00:38:22.851 --> 00:38:24.465


Yeah, we've gone a long time.00:38:24.746 --> 00:38:25.648


So the last couple years.00:38:25.648 --> 00:38:28.130


They keep telling us they're going to close the beach to remodel it.00:38:28.130 --> 00:38:40.324


So we've been trying to like, okay, we've made another trip, so we've gone other places because we weren't going to Tahoe, and then the last minute's open, and then we've been going to Tahoe too, yeah, and then Kyle's all what the you know.00:38:40.324 --> 00:38:44.715


So this year we booked Tahoe thinking it's still going to be open, still going to be open.00:38:44.715 --> 00:38:47.298


Then they just sent us an email that it's really going to be closed.00:38:47.298 --> 00:38:49.360


This year they're going to redo it and it's officially closed.00:38:49.360 --> 00:38:49.820


Do you think it's?00:38:49.860 --> 00:38:50.922


officially closed yeah.00:38:51.005 --> 00:38:52.429


That email was pretty official yeah.00:38:52.510 --> 00:38:53.532


And it's like on the website.00:38:53.532 --> 00:38:54.945


I feel like it's pretty it's happening.00:38:54.965 --> 00:38:55.226


Yeah.00:38:55.226 --> 00:38:58.213


So we decided, okay, where should we go?00:38:58.213 --> 00:39:00.677


Right, and I know that it's annoying.00:39:00.677 --> 00:39:03.259


I'm sure it is because we travel a lot.00:39:03.259 --> 00:39:11.461


People bring it up to me all the time Really, oh my gosh, this weekend, like three people they're like and you travel and I see your post and I hate that about posts, but I want the memories.00:39:11.461 --> 00:39:14.163


But you know we both didn't travel as kids.00:39:14.163 --> 00:39:15.503


This is my justification.00:39:15.503 --> 00:39:17.065


My parents went to the casino.00:39:17.065 --> 00:39:20.510


I'm taking my kids to the casino but like it's just like.00:39:20.510 --> 00:39:21.851


I went on mission trips as a kid.00:39:21.851 --> 00:39:23.313


I love seeing, like the world.00:39:23.313 --> 00:39:25.036


I think it's just good.00:39:25.036 --> 00:39:29.581


But where we're going, I'm not really always showing the kids another part of the world.00:39:30.186 --> 00:39:31.592


It's like and we're always in high ends.00:39:31.704 --> 00:39:33.813


They're like no, but yeah.00:39:33.813 --> 00:39:38.710


So we all picked a place that we wanted to go, because we couldn't decide where to go.00:39:38.851 --> 00:39:41.092


Yeah, and all the kids wanted different places.00:39:41.164 --> 00:39:44.014


So we all let them write and we never really let them get a say in anything.00:39:44.014 --> 00:39:44.755


No, they never get a say.00:39:52.784 --> 00:39:54.429


In to say no, they never get to say and anything.00:39:54.429 --> 00:39:55.992


Yeah, so we let them all write wherever they wanted to go.00:39:55.992 --> 00:39:56.875


It had to be within like five hours.00:39:56.875 --> 00:39:58.418


Yeah, you know, we're yeah close, we're really laying the hammer down.00:39:58.438 --> 00:40:01.063


Yeah, stupid, I'm all no tahiti, you know like, idiot like, but we did.00:40:01.063 --> 00:40:03.268


We're like nothing crazy, just somewhere you've wanted to go.00:40:03.690 --> 00:40:04.833


So it was super fun.00:40:04.833 --> 00:40:10.311


They saw it on tiktok, like where you like everyone puts in a hat and you draw it out, like girls have done it for girls trips.00:40:10.311 --> 00:40:11.668


So we were like, okay, we'll do it.00:40:11.969 --> 00:40:13.173


So we did it, it was so fun.00:40:13.173 --> 00:40:25.414


It was so fun and like five people all wanted a cruise, I put in a cruise and there was a lot of us, I put in a cruise too.00:40:25.414 --> 00:40:26.333


And then who picked?00:40:26.333 --> 00:40:26.855


Kyle?00:40:26.855 --> 00:40:29.916


Fox, I think Fox, oh, Tisha's youngest, and it was Kyle's.00:40:29.916 --> 00:40:32.159


It was Hawaii, hawaii, so we're going to Hawaii.00:40:32.159 --> 00:40:34.300


And then Kyle was like wait, we're really going there.00:40:34.400 --> 00:40:35.501


I was just putting in a place.00:40:35.501 --> 00:40:36.561


Like he didn't believe it.00:40:36.561 --> 00:40:37.023


We're like no.00:40:44.472 --> 00:40:46.195


Like that's where me too.00:40:46.195 --> 00:40:47.597


So we're just booking that.00:40:47.597 --> 00:40:48.438


We're really excited.00:40:48.438 --> 00:40:56.007


So if you have any good ideas for Hawaii, but it's a super fun thing to do, kyle and I have done it on a date night before because Kyle's like a kid and he likes when I do these things for him.00:40:56.007 --> 00:41:04.452


When we were dating, I always did these things yeah, that is a fun date night.00:41:04.452 --> 00:41:08.318


So I did it for Valentine's do, and then he got to pick one yeah, and then he ended up opening them all.00:41:08.318 --> 00:41:09.619


Yeah, because he just thinks it's fun.00:41:09.639 --> 00:41:10.320


That's what I would do.00:41:10.320 --> 00:41:11.769


And then I'm like, what do you want to do?00:41:12.266 --> 00:41:14.474


And he's like this is so fun, but it takes five minutes.00:41:22.492 --> 00:41:24.653


And then I've done it with Broxie and you do that in the bedroom.00:41:24.653 --> 00:41:25.996


You're like Edit, edit, Lee, Edit.00:41:26.115 --> 00:41:27.077


She's going to call you Lee.00:41:27.077 --> 00:41:28.677


Yeah, that's who does our editing.00:41:28.677 --> 00:41:32.322


Oh God, it's going to be fine Anyways, but it was really fun.00:41:32.322 --> 00:41:38.708


I did it with Broxton, cause he doesn't go on all our cheer trips, so I did envelopes.00:41:38.708 --> 00:41:40.050


He got to pick what we were doing for the day.00:41:40.050 --> 00:41:40.771


Oh, that's fun.00:41:40.771 --> 00:41:41.873


Yeah, we went to Dave and Buster's.00:41:41.873 --> 00:41:43.034


We went, like it was fun.00:41:43.034 --> 00:41:44.056


That is fun.00:41:44.056 --> 00:41:48.581


Yeah, we wanted our kids to have memories where, like when they go away, they want to do these things.00:41:48.722 --> 00:41:50.844


Yeah, because I didn't have a ton of that growing up.00:41:50.844 --> 00:41:55.172


Yeah, we're just into the family memories and our kids think they're like Family, family.00:41:55.594 --> 00:41:58.030


Yeah, they tell people there's a lot of weird cousins yeah.00:41:58.811 --> 00:42:02.126


It's fun, yeah, so yeah, I can't believe you told that story though.00:42:02.887 --> 00:42:05.349


Oh, we're really going away, so I'm excited.00:42:05.349 --> 00:42:06.110


I'm excited.00:42:06.110 --> 00:42:07.211


We have Cooperstown too.00:42:07.211 --> 00:42:08.672


Everybody says that's the best trip.00:42:08.672 --> 00:42:09.333


Are you going to go?00:42:10.074 --> 00:42:12.577


I don't know, I'm a little stressed about it.00:42:12.697 --> 00:42:14.840


Yeah, it's baseball year.00:42:14.840 --> 00:42:16.021


Everybody says it's great.00:42:16.461 --> 00:42:24.313


Yeah, everyone says it's great.00:42:24.313 --> 00:42:28.476


I mean Ben's for sure going because he's staying in the barracks with Bear, but it's just the like.00:42:28.476 --> 00:42:29.577


Something's going to happen.00:42:29.577 --> 00:42:37.166


I'm going to be in New York just stressful, you know, yeah, anyways.00:42:37.166 --> 00:42:53.574


So, anyways, yeah, but you know, we were talking about baseball this weekend because we had a tournament and, um, ben was telling me someone is there's some like academy or something, I don't even know, but there it's's like basically you homeschool your kid and then you send him to this like academy to do baseball all the time, you know.00:42:53.574 --> 00:42:55.626


And Ben was like are you thinking about it?00:42:55.626 --> 00:43:13.563


No, and so Ben was telling me and I was like, yeah, but like and I'm not judging anyone that does that, because I think everyone has their own thing, what they think is great, and that's great allegedly, allegedly, but I'm I was like I don't want that's so much pressure to put on a kid.00:43:13.744 --> 00:43:30.847


Yeah, I already feel like they have a lot of pressure so much pressure and and I was telling, I was telling Ben, I'm like you know exactly to make it and I was telling Ben, just like that service where that Swayze Bozeman spoke, like him not getting drafted right away was the best thing that ever happened to him because it increased his faith.00:43:30.847 --> 00:43:44.800


And I was like, by making it so, like I don't want Bear or any of our kids to be so obsessed with making it that they're like I want their identity to be in Jesus and in like who they are you know yeah.00:43:45.001 --> 00:43:45.925


I think that's such a good point.00:43:45.925 --> 00:43:53.007


There's a lot of pressure on kids in sports these days and we talked about how much we love imagine like oh, my parents homeschooled me and they put me in this academy every day.00:43:53.208 --> 00:43:53.929


That's like gymnasts.00:43:54.030 --> 00:43:57.329


They have that yeah and then, and it's great, and I do know it- needs.00:43:57.329 --> 00:44:04.090


You need that to get to the next level, but I also know you don't always have to have that well, I think a lot of kids that had a lot of pressure on them at young ages for that stuff.00:44:04.090 --> 00:44:07.755


They ended up in high school not even playing the sport Totally Well, because you can't mentally take it.00:44:07.755 --> 00:44:10.840


Or if something happens an injury not even burnout.00:44:10.885 --> 00:44:12.835


What if you injury and you can never play again?00:44:12.835 --> 00:44:19.534


You're going to be in like a depression because your whole identity is wrapped up into that and then it's taken away.00:44:19.534 --> 00:44:27.775


So if your identity is in in Jesus and in other things too, then it's like it's not detrimental.00:44:28.157 --> 00:44:28.478


Have you?00:44:28.478 --> 00:44:32.733


You never have read these self-help books, but seven habits of a highly effective person.00:44:32.733 --> 00:44:34.949


It's the best book ever, besides the other best books.00:44:35.009 --> 00:44:41.753


I said but one of the big chapters is begin with the end in mind and it's in anything you do, picture the ending and then plan backwards.00:44:41.753 --> 00:44:56.327


So it's funny because we do this in business Like I'm into all that stuff like a mission statement, and begin with end in mind, or what are your girls goals at the year, and now let's play backwards of how we're going to get there and even like with what I'm picturing, a championship team, okay, how am I going to get there?00:44:56.327 --> 00:45:09.768


But we don't always do that stuff with our families, like we don't plan it, like to to be successful in anything, it's proven that you need a plan for anything, like when we, when we sell a house, there's a full strategy and plan in order to be successful.00:45:09.768 --> 00:45:13.949


But why, with our families and our marriages, do we just think that that stuff isn't as important?00:45:13.949 --> 00:45:21.155


We let the very minimum, like we just ride by the seat of our pants and like if I stay married, great, if my husband still likes me, great.00:45:21.155 --> 00:45:23.067


If my kids are priority, great.00:45:23.206 --> 00:45:31.300


But like I sometimes try to like, plan the family too, okay, if you begin with the end in mind, when my kids are 30, what matters?00:45:31.300 --> 00:45:33.590


And it's crazy when you really think about that.00:45:33.590 --> 00:45:41.260


The pressure of sports and all those other things kind of changes your perspective, like even when I've missed family trips because of all-star cheerleading.00:45:41.260 --> 00:45:45.409


If I would have been beginning with the end in mind, I would have been like, no, they're going to Lake Powell.00:45:45.409 --> 00:45:48.755


That's more important in 10 years than this is right now.00:45:48.755 --> 00:45:51.038


So it's like crazy, sometimes I will do that.00:45:51.038 --> 00:45:52.539


Okay, who do I want my kids to be?00:45:52.539 --> 00:45:57.907


Right, like when they're married.00:45:57.907 --> 00:46:00.057


I want them to look back on these memories and actually Hawaii would be beginning with the end in mind.00:46:00.057 --> 00:46:03.467


That moment would be something that's a priority to me, that they had these good family moments.00:46:03.467 --> 00:46:08.072


But would them running around to club sports or them, you know, is that going to be it?00:46:08.313 --> 00:46:13.297


And sometimes when in cheerleading for us it's a very selfish sport, it's very about them.00:46:13.297 --> 00:46:16.382


Let's buy them this, let's give them that, let's make it about them.00:46:16.382 --> 00:46:19.934


But is that really helping them develop and who they want we want them to be?00:46:19.934 --> 00:46:33.106


Well, it is when Drew's praying with them and teaching them how to work and adversity, right, those are the characteristics that do.00:46:33.106 --> 00:46:34.186


But is winning really helping them be better in life?00:46:34.186 --> 00:46:34.346


I don't know.00:46:34.346 --> 00:46:35.425


And like this weekend, we didn't win, we got third.00:46:35.425 --> 00:46:36.065


We were in second in prelims.00:46:36.065 --> 00:46:40.170


We didn't do our very best, but the girls fought so hard and it was the most magical weekend because the real things mattered.00:46:40.170 --> 00:46:43.226


We talked about faith, we talked about God, we talked about never giving up.00:46:43.226 --> 00:46:47.996


We treated each other right, we overcame doubt and all these things.00:46:47.996 --> 00:46:52.150


So for us it was a success, but it maybe wasn't the success of the world.00:46:52.150 --> 00:47:00.514


You know like by winning I don't know, it's weird Like even planning date nights, planning making those things a priority first and then let the other things come in play.00:47:00.704 --> 00:47:17.418


You know like, with our families, sometimes we don't attack it like we do our worldly things, our businesses or our you know, well, that's yeah, like if you think of your kids at 30, like I want them to be successful, but like there's a lot of people that have like success, whether it be in sports or careers, but they're not happy.00:47:17.418 --> 00:47:18.302


No, benzo.00:47:18.302 --> 00:47:24.248


I don't think he's happy it's like what is give you who Jeff Benzo Isn't that?00:47:24.268 --> 00:47:25.150


his name Bezos Bezos.00:47:25.329 --> 00:47:26.331


Yeah, Amal who's?00:47:26.331 --> 00:47:26.791


Benzo.00:47:26.791 --> 00:47:28.032


I thought you were talking about Ben Amal.00:47:28.032 --> 00:47:29.554


Is that his new name, amal?00:47:29.554 --> 00:47:32.536


I like Bunny better, but Benzo Whatever.00:47:33.177 --> 00:47:33.918


Amal is just so sweet.00:47:33.918 --> 00:47:36.280


Bezos, yeah, and you're all you idiot.00:47:36.280 --> 00:47:44.273


Yeah, I know I'm like what the you know well.00:47:44.273 --> 00:47:45.215


But I don't think he's happy.00:47:45.456 --> 00:47:50.467


Yeah, and like fulfillment and happiness and what really brings you, that would be obviously there.00:47:50.467 --> 00:47:52.922


That'd be making church a priority.00:47:53.021 --> 00:47:53.846


Like all those things Right.00:47:53.846 --> 00:47:54.610


I was just thinking that.00:47:55.525 --> 00:48:04.677


This church this weekend was about that, yeah, and it was like about how big of a priority it is, and it's so true because I'm like you can have all the things but you won't be happy.00:48:09.405 --> 00:48:11.148


I mean, yeah, I feel like I do want to be rich, but but I'm already happy and I'm not.00:48:11.148 --> 00:48:13.454


Yeah, benzos, he is rich, but he lost his marriage, exactly.00:48:13.454 --> 00:48:17.016


Yeah, he's not with his kids every night when he says good night, right, I don't know.00:48:17.016 --> 00:48:24.387


I think that if he would have began with the end in mind I say this all the time right, people lose their family, providing for their family.00:48:24.387 --> 00:48:27.998


Right, he just wanted to provide a good life for his family in building this company.00:48:27.998 --> 00:48:29.001


Yeah, I saw this thing.00:48:29.141 --> 00:48:29.965


And then he lost his family.00:48:29.965 --> 00:48:39.297


A mom has to like make $85,000 a year to in order to feel the impact of her job after daycare.00:48:39.297 --> 00:48:43.364


That's so much money Like a lot of people don't make $85,000 a year.00:48:43.364 --> 00:48:47.117


So like if you're making less than $85,000, it's not worth you working.00:48:47.137 --> 00:48:47.478


Staying at work.00:48:47.478 --> 00:48:48.260


Yeah, like that's crazy.00:48:48.260 --> 00:48:49.585


Well, that's what happened when I was teaching.00:48:49.585 --> 00:48:51.552


I was like for us to pay for daycare.00:48:51.552 --> 00:48:52.293


It's my whole paycheck.00:48:53.226 --> 00:48:55.474


Yeah, so you're paying for someone else to raise your kids.00:48:55.474 --> 00:48:56.456


It's crazy.00:48:57.025 --> 00:49:04.856


I know it's hard because I juggle that where I feel guilty certain weeks, like I was out of town all week without my other two kids, I, and I'm feeling so guilty.00:49:04.856 --> 00:49:15.432


So I think I'm going to get Broxton early from school and like take him to a movie, and again, school might be a priority, but if I'm beginning with the end in mind, me showing up for him is way more important.00:49:15.432 --> 00:49:20.211


It's so funny because Kyle was raised and I was raised where we didn't miss school.00:49:20.211 --> 00:49:24.788


You were raised where you were allowed to miss school and I'm the opposite now.00:49:24.807 --> 00:49:26.849


Yes, and I like think it's the stupidest thing.00:49:26.849 --> 00:49:29.431


I would be so sick at school and I would be like, why can't I be home?00:49:29.431 --> 00:49:31.952


Yeah, but my parents were working and didn't want to worry about me at home.00:49:31.952 --> 00:49:38.376


And like, now that Maddie's in high school, she never misses school and I'm so glad I let her miss in elementary school, even though I got attendance letters and stuff.00:49:38.376 --> 00:49:41.338


Not like it was just free fall, but I'm so glad I did that.00:49:41.338 --> 00:49:43.659


Yeah, anyways, begin with the end in mind.00:49:43.659 --> 00:49:52.061


Like in the bedroom, yeah, exactly, see you next week.00:49:52.061 --> 00:50:00.646


Welcome to jerking around a podcast that makes you feel better about yourself because we're a mess, just like you, and crystal makes fun of me, and it's great, and it's real.00:50:00.646 --> 00:50:01.047


Bye.